DE: Time to take your medicine

[bjornwilde]

Inspired by my having to give a grumpy cockatiel liquid antibiotics...

 

If your pup had to give medicine to a less than helpful patient, how would they do it? Do they depend on patience, guile or just get it overwith?

 

Bonus points for revealing who they are treating.

Also, the suggestion box is getting light again. Leave a comment with a topic for the daily entertainment and we'll give you credit when we use it.

Comments

[a1enzo]

Well, there was this.

If it really came down to it, he does carry a stunner these days…

[katyafeline]

Katya: Would hide it in a piece of wonderbread. Or threaten to get out the fish oil.

Ace: Would either leave Harry or Annie to it - it's either Annie that's sick, in which case Ace needs to get the heck out of the way, or it's one of the kids that's sick, and Annie will do it best.

Balthazar: Would lecture. A lot. His victim would take the medication just to get him to shut up.

Glorfindel: Is not going to coddle anyone - either you take it, because you were injured or stupid enough to let the healers catch you, or you get a gag caught between your teeth and you'll be forced to take it.

Bones: Is going to get you with that hypospray, don't even joke. He's like a ninja. A blue-clad, grumpy ninja.

Haymitch: Is going to wait to give it until you're going to use it and be grateful about it - sour looks and stilted conversation don't encourage sponsors, sweetheart.

Blakeney: Would try to talk you into it. Reasonably. And then get Dr. Maturin.

Jemma: Look, if you ever want her to stop babbling just take the medication. Really. She can do that all day. And you not taking the medication is making her nervous so she's going to babble more, you're making it worse.

Clara/Oswin: Similar approach - lots of patience, but lots of being a smart-mouth at your expense the longer you put it off.

[neverbelievedintheend]

Well, one of my two actual medical characters would be Medic. Herr Medic would load the medication into his Blutsauger and shoot the patient with it, assuming he couldn't get Herr Heavy or Herr Soldier to tackle the patient and hold them down while he administered it some other way. Medic is much like the honey badger in terms of what he does not give.

The other actual medical character is Professor Mordin Solus. Mordin would talk at the patient at higher and higher speeds until they were so frustrated or overwhelmed by the flood of information that they agreed to let him administer it just to get him to shut up. Either that or he'd cheerfully admit to having rigged the local ventilation system to deliver the medication in aerosol form and that he'd only been talking that whole time to make sure that they inhaled enough of it to work.

Shephard would threaten the patient. With a knife. Repeatedly Very cheerfully, but he'd still threaten them into it; the false Gordon didn't call him Crazy the Marine for nothing.

Gordon would.... hrmph. Probably look mournfully at the patient for a while, then call for D0G, and while the robot stood behind him making Meaningful Gestures, ask the patient to cooperate. I don't think he'd be able to follow through on any implied threats, though.

Varric would pay an attractive member of the appropriate sex to assist him in the process and either slip the healing potion into the patient's drink while the attractive person was doing their work or just have the attractive person convince the target that they really, really wanted to take that drink.

The only time Ellen's had to administer chems to a less than helpful patient was when she was fostering Lord Ashur's daughter, and she did it with a great deal of regret. Mostly it took the form of mixing powdered or liquid chems into Marie's food, but there may have been one case of having to hold the baby's nose until she opened her mouth and then eyedroppering the chems in.

Stacker Pentecost would turn on the full force of his Bill Adama-class glare and then inform the patient in no uncertain tones that they WOULD be taking that medicine. NOW.

And Edward Kenway would shrug and say it was no skin off his nose if the other person felt like dying, although he might go so far as to get them too drunk to object if he felt it was really important for some reason.

[vance_prime]

Gordon has two eighteen-month-old children and you would have us believe he doesn't know how to deal with uncooperative people?

[neverbelievedintheend]

I was mostly thinking of uncooperative adults. The prospect of a baby didn't occur to me until I was up to Ellen's slot.

I suspect in the case of children, a certain amount of tickling is involved.

[bjornwilde]

Val would be patience and tenacious. She would try guile, hiding the medicine in yummy food and while she could easily resort to brute force, she doesn't go with family members unless they are mind controlled. I first thought of Ben Grimm as the patient but then it occurred to me it could also be Lockjaw as she'd be one of the few people who could try and keep up with him.

Jess tries patience, begging, guile, and her pheromones but ultimately has to resort to force. Carol likely won't recognize her apartment any longer but her cat, Chewie, is healthy!

Thalia scowls and intimidates the patient. Since she has a puppy now I am going to assume she is the patient, in which case Thalia will have to resort to food bribes or wrestling.

Anton will have a daughter to care for and I imagine it will just take a bit of magic to solve the problem if there ever is one. Truth be told, Svetlana will be the one dealing with it. If Svetlana isn't available, he'll beg Olga to help. If that fails, well he'll bribe with candy. He has no shame.

Quinlan will use patience and the Force if possible. If it is the family pet, the Force takes care of it. If it is his wife, son or daughter, then patience will win the day; though he may scowl at his kids to get the job done. If it is someone else, then he'll just bully them.

Andrea will try to be nice but if the patient is still stubborn, she'll call in Dr. Doolittle and no one says no the were-honey badger med-mage. At least not to his face.

Mulan will be implacable and persistent, the patient finally giving in just to shut her up. The other option is to wait until the patient passes out and administer the cure then.

Brimstone has Issa for this sort of thing.

[road_to_calvary]

Valjean is the most patient ever. I can only imagine him administering medicine to a child, and if they didn't want it, he would rely heavily on stories, and tickles, and choo-choo noises, and would basically be the most dadlike ever.

Javert would put medicine down in front of someone, and say 'take it'. If they refused, he would shrug and tell them to make sure they suffered quietly then, so as not to disturb people around them (who undoubtedly have more sense than this idiot). If they had something infectious, he would be a tad more insistent, because really, it's just bad to knowingly spread infections around. Not that he understands much about how they're spread at all, but you get what I mean.

Gene is much like Javert in this sense. Actually, the Bruces are too, though both with less sarcastic eye-rolling and commentary.

[genarti]

With Thor, it depends on whether they're a subject of his or not. If they're a subject of his (i.e. Asgardian or otherwise sworn to Odin), he'd first suggest they do it, and then (depending on how vitally important it was) either command it or shrug and go "Okay, on your own head be it." If they're not his subject, commanding it via actual authority isn't an option, although a certain amount of leaning on his force of authoritative personality might be. In general, he leaves this kind of thing to the healers. He'd only get really insistent if he were convinced that their recalcitrance was either a) life-threatening for no good reason, or b) endangering other people for no good reason.

River is probably dealing with Mal, and she would roll her eyes and tell him to quit whining. He would not quit whining, but he'd probably tone it down and let her do it. Because, honestly, River trumps most of her acquaintances in reason to object to medical procedures and reason to put up with them anyway, and most of her acquaintances know it.

Regan is probably dealing with... you know, I was going to say Gabriel, but I don't know that he's actually unhelpful. They don't always agree about where to compromise on his treatment, but that's not quite the same thing. He's an adult; he can make his own medical decisions, and if they disagree they'll argue it out. When River and Simon were kids, they'd get bribes -- you know, a treat afterward for being good, and probably a discussion of what was medically going on here to distract them during.

Enjolras leaves this to other, more nurturing people by preference, but if it fell to him he would employ reason. At whatever length was necessary. This includes with grumpy sick people and with kids, because Enjolras doesn't really know how to interact with kids except to treat them as adults anyway. They would probably eventually give in just to end the discussion, unless they did manage to convince him that not taking the medicine was a reasonable choice based on rational principles, but it might take a while. (Enjolras is fully capable of getting frustrated by how long it's taking, especially if the other person isn't mustering good arguments, but he'd try not to show it.)

Clare would state it as a thing that needs to be done, and assume it was going to be. If the person objected at length and with determination, she'd either just force-feed them, or (far more likely) give up and let the person deal with the consequences. It's probably Raki.

Trowa... it depends on what and who it is! Either guile or just letting it be on their own head, depending on how much he respected their judgment and how serious it was (and whether it was risking bystanders.) If it's something that just affects the patient, he'd probably let them make the call even if it was a stupid one, if he thought that they were competent. Any Gundam pilot, for example, gets to be an idiot about medicine if they want to, but Trowa might silently (but clearly) judge them for it.

[damncompass]

Joshua generally leaves the giving-of-medicine to others, but he has given things to Claudia before. Most of that involved bribes, probably of the 'I'll do your chores for you' sort.

Helena would also get someone else to do it, but if she couldn't, she'd probably use her charm skills to get whoever it is to take it.

Valentine and Fantine are just looking at me funny.

[herr_bookman]

Depends! If Autor were tending to Sunshine, his most awful trump card is, "if you're sick you can't bake/fight vampires = other people are affected."

If it were, say, Oswin, he'd sass, argue, beg, and sic Bones on her--in that order.

Everyone else is gruffly and awkwardly Reasoned At, with a side order of, "oh, just take the things so we can never talk about this again."

[ceitfianna]

Will is usually the one trying not to take medicine, but he tends to go with bribing and saying things along the lines, "Just take it then (insert doctor-Tuck, McCoy, Guppy) will stop makin' those faces."

Charles will use reason, persuasion and if none of that is working a strong suggestion.

Moist would rather not be in that position but mainly persuasion and putting the medicine in something.

William has had to do this with his brother and I think his father at times, lots of cajoling and things like sooner you take it, sooner its over with, also bribery.

Sameth would ask for a while, but medicine is more Charter and less actual medicine in the Old Kingdom, so its more just stay still and it feels nice.

Jane would talk and persuade and possibly hide it in something.

Demeter would be stubborn, she would start off nice but soon reach a point of no, you're taking this now.

Tumnus would ask and ask while pointing out just how much it will help.

The Pirate King would make Ruth do the giving but basically be stubborn about it.

My possible new headvoice would use tricks and force, he did this with Miles in Memory by throwing him in an ice bath and making him get dressed.

[bjornwilde]

And I just realized I forgot Hank.

Hank would likely lecture, going into vivid detail on the effects of the illness and how things like mucus are produced and what they are meant to do, maybe even going into the evolution of said disease. Likely the victim patient would take the medicine just so he would stop talking.

[not_my_sandbox]

Amascut, nursing someone back to health? HAHA.

YOU DO NOT DISOBEY ME. YOU WILL TAKE YOUR MEDICINE BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT YOU WANT TO DO. ALSO, I WAS NEVER HERE AND HAD NO INFLUENCE ON YOUR DECISION.

I think Fairy Fixit is the only one of mine who doesn't need scare quotes around the word medicine. She most likely takes the "explain the benefits of the medicine in exhaustive detail" route, but medicine isn't really her strong suite and she'll most likely pepper in harmful side effects if she knows them. Or maybe use an appeal to authority/someone who actually knows medicine.

[bjornwilde]

And actually, Anton wouldn't bother Olga with something so trivial; well, trivial in the grand scheme of things. He'd think it but never act on it. She might hear regardless and show up anyway, but he'd never ask.

[inlovewithwords]

Henry would probably wheedle and whine and try to be authoritative and fail at it, and just cute puppy-dog-eyes compliance. Or something. Also, screw you canon.

Eriond, assuming this were not a situation where Polgara were around to be the one administering medicine, would probably try to reason things through to a point, and if it were truly bad enough he'd then sigh regretfully, "I'm sorry, but you really are sick, and I can't let you sabotage yourself like this." And then they'd find themselves taking the medication. Somehow. I don't know, he's Eriond, he'd be sweet about it.

Lois does not do sweet. She would complain and bludgeon and harass until medicine were taken. And just make a pest of herself.

In Tavi's current life, generally any situation like this is likely to be with one of his subordinates, at which point it's an order. Rank is handy that way. Otherwise he'd make a pest of himself, but less in a 'I am being a pest so do what I want so I leave' way (the Lois method) and more in a 'I am going to show you why I'm right and you're going to do what I want' way.

Damnit, you've inspired fic

[crazyfurries]

Tyler:

Getting super-powered kids with colds to take their medicine was generally an extremely involved process. Sometimes powers didn't shut down when someone caught a cold, or ate something they shouldn't have; throwing various powers into the mix didn't help. Bernard's roommate was about as helpful as a snarky speak and spell when it came to getting the pint-sized blueberry-hulk to take his cold pills, Tyler thought, sighing as he got into a hazmat suit.

Not that Dr. Newby didn't try but any attempt an adult made to give him medicine was rebuked. So he'd thought of something else, asking if he could read Bernard a story.

Things had kind of snowballed from there.

Re: Damnit, you've inspired fic

[bjornwilde]

YAY!!! \o/

And good to see you! =D