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I'm working on a bit of a plotline, and thought I should ask around : Whose character would be capable of helping to deliver a baby? I'll need to get in contact with them over a couple details. the bulk will be improv, as always, but there's a certain factor I want to control without having to make OOC comments in the middle of things.

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Oh, cool! Hmmm. Not sure if that's the sort of thing Tonks would have gone over in Auror training or not. I'd be happy to have her help if you don't get any better offers.

I have a new character,

lyra_silver (Lyra Silvertongue, Philip Pullman's His Dark Materials), who knows nothing about childbirth but is perfectly happy to get involved in just about anything. I'll probably bring her in on Tuesday or Wednesday, after which she'll be around quite a bit more than Ros and Guil.

Lizzie would know. The women of a house assisted the medical help at childbirths, and sometimes even took the place of a doc or midwife, if one couldn't be gotten in time. The joys of dodgy transportation and the idea of "women's work". :)

Ohhh, definitely, yes! And Tonks can boil water with the best of them while Lizzie takes the helm. :)

Ooh, Tonk's magic would be wonderful! Boiling water, conjuring towels and such, anesthetic/healing spells... one would kill for such an assistant.

And if worse came to worst, one could always try "Accio baby!" ;)

ROFL...count me in!

Seriously, I've always wondered about that. Just how does wizard childbirth work? Would long, painful labor still be standard, or would magic drastically shorten it?

I'd personally pay to see "Accio baby!", though. :D

I can just picture it...

Lizzie: Push! Push!
Snow: *groan*
Lizzie: Breathe, you can do it!
Snow: *scream of pain* Get it out!
Lizzie: Pu --
Tonks: Oh, just give it over already. *rolls up sleeves, pushes Lizzie out of the way* Accio baby!
Snow: *shrieks because, you know, large object + small opening + sudden force = pain like a mofo*
Lizzie: *gapes*
Baby: WAHHH!
Tonks: Sorry, that was a bit messy, wasn't it? *casts cleaning spells* My mom could do this so much neater.

Yeah, I'm guessing the "large object+small space" aspect means that witches still have to go through the agony of labor. Pity, because I would LOVE to see a shrieking newborn flying through the bar.

Oooohh, but maybe there's a Dilating Spell! "Not at ten centimeters yet? No problem! Swish and flick!"

*cracks up* Oh god, the mental image associated with that! Although it would certainly ensure that Quidditch Keepers would have a job when they retired from professional sports. Someone would have to catch the baby.

If there's such a thing as a Dilating Spell in the wizarding world, I want to resign my status as a Muggle posthaste. The "swish and flick", however, kills me. :)

Maybe this is why there are so many Weasley's...cause it's so damn easy to have a kid. I haven't yet seen Molly yelling "FORTY-SIX HOURS IN LABOR!" at the twins, which seems like just the sort of thing she'd lord over them.

...Hmmm. I think we're on to something. We should write to JKR and demand an explanation. :)

(And by the way, your Quidditch Keeper comment makes me TOTALLY want Oliver Wood there for the birth. *cackles* )

I can so hear her saying that. So hear it.

I've actually contemplated writing. If she does another chat, and I can get a question in, I fully intend to ask that question. I'm debating if I'm a big enough geek to write to her care of her publishers.

If I had any talent for writing Oliver, I would so bring him in. Because frankly, birth aside, I want Oliver anywhere. *grins devilishly*

*has had sudden vision of Lizzie seducing innocent little Oliver, and fallen off desk chair*

Ooh. I like that idea.

*prays fervently for an Oliver!mun to show up*

Poor Lizzie.

Ohhh, but if he does show up, Lizzie and Tonks could get into a huge catfight over him...

Bring it, sistah! :)

And Sirius and Jack Sparrow could sell tickets.

Lizzie would like to request that mud not be involved, though. She's seen quite enough mud to last her a lifetime, and shudders to think of the state of her gowns afterwards.

She also says that Tonks is going down. :)

*cackles* I'll make sure Tonks has on her most seductive torn Wierd Sisters shirt. Oliver won't know what hit him.

*snerks* You apparently haven't seen some of the gowns from the Regency period. For a culture that found it scandalous for a lady's ankle to be seen, there certainly wasn't any compunction about flashing cleavage.

I take my poor Lizzie back. Poor Oliver.

*makes plans for Tonks to buy electric green pleather bustier*

So not fair. Lizzie's just discovered pants, and you're cracking out the bustiers. Honestly.

*decides to have Lizzie check to see if she brought her corset with her*

Owie.

My thought exactly when it came up in that conversation. Can you imagine the tearing?

But then, if wizards can charm a car's interior to seat five people comfortably on the same backseat, or the boot to accommodate six people's school trunks, perhaps they could apply the same principle to childbirth?

Gabriel could, being an angel and all, but only on weekends (I'm not free during the week for... another two weeks).

Er ... there's a thing that Nobby could in no way do. *eeps*

*cringe*
Well, Raph isn't squeamish when it comes to blood or screaming, and he does know how to suture.

Fighting ninjas is dangerous work, you see.

Beatrice definitely can.

Bartleby can hang around being useless, if necessary.

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