So...plot.

[futures_of_ash]

Ladies and Gentlemen, for your consideration: a bar plot.

Once upon a time, ages back, Arithon s'Ffalenn and Rachel Grey did their best to reach ever onward, upward, and outward in the realm of cooking and make soup and bread. Trust me, for this they were reaching. Neither of them could cook worth a damn. Really.

The end results of that thread was pizza, a sentient tree that self-identified as Rai, and sentient bread. (Yes, those of you who cook, it is not actually even related to bread. That's what the characters assumed it was, so that's what it assumed it was.)

The last line in that thread was: Or so those eye stalks at the window would have them believe as they slip away into the murky depths...yes, let them celebrate...

What's the point of all this? Simple. The bread is coming back to Milliways intent on finding its creators. One of whom is almost never around anymore, and the other of whom is long retired.

And in the two years since the bread was born the various gobbets of it have undergone something of a schism. Which is to say that half of it believes that it should respect The Creators and live good little bready lives, and the other half believes that it should kill The Creators for throwing it out the window into the Thames.

The bread is going to be taking over the greenhouse for its little war. It won't be dangerous to anyone (it's cornstarch, eggs, milk, water, butter, and several kinds of magic) although it can be various levels of annoying with great ease.

The players can attempt to communicate with the bread, attempt to destroy it (succeed in destroying individual bits of it- although that could piss off the side that glob was on! You could get drafted into the Bread Holy War with help from the other side and attacks from the one you went after), attempt to ignore it, whatever. The bread cannot talk, so actual communication is a no go, but pantomime and charades work just as well for recruiters! Any bread 'captured' or 'studied' will choose to die in most circumstances, breaking down into it's component parts. Those wanting to discuss 'pet bread' or the like will need to ping/email me at Veldrin Dalharil or steahl(at)yahoo(dot)com

A note to those of you with slightly more than normal pups: The bread eats magic. All kinds of magic, from cantrip level to deity level. Your good factions are going to beg for hand outs...your bad? Are going to hunt down tasty people and glob them! The bread cannot cause lasting harm with it's feeding, so no worries of hospitalization.

Now the fun part; effective weaponry. Bread dough, or those things calling themselves such, are not well known for their weaknesses. Most attacks will simply leave the bread stunned. Blunt weaponry is very good for the stunning effect, as are walls, floors, boots, etc. Knives, swords, daggers? Well...congratulations, you've increased the ranks! Cut dough and you get...more dough. Fire, deep frying, and boiling are more effective methods for killing a portion of bread...but no doubt there are others out there.

When people get bored the Second Coming will occur (that'd be Annie Wells, baker) and the bread will get soundly whopped with spoons until it settles down.

My schedule and ability to type are limited, so it's mainly a free-for-all plot that should start next Tuesday for those interested.

Comments

[slayer_fray]

Hey, would the bread recognise anything of its Creators in Mel?

[futures_of_ash]

Sadly, Rachel never used the Phoenix Force against the bread once it was 'born'. They'll be looking more for the memory of Rachel's appearance from ankle height paired with Teke than any lingering traces of the Phoenix Force.

And really, that search isn't the point. They're totally getting side tracked by their faction war!

[raptorcanaria]

Shame.

Oh well, still funtimes to be had.

[futures_of_ash]

Yes, many fun times full of doughy sticky goodness!

[spooky-lemur.livejournal.com]

No promises, but I can see Ben yelling, "IT'S KNEADING TIME!" and the ensuing crack.

[futures_of_ash]

And that would be AWESOME, as this is all about crack my dear *beams*

[whisper2ascream.livejournal.com]

Dude I so want to see that thread now. XDDDD

[spooky-lemur.livejournal.com]

What really adds to it is that Ben is a cook via canon. I wouldn't say he's a foodie but it could be argued.

I think I'll have to keep my eyes open for it.

[52-dropoff.livejournal.com]

What happens if you eat it?

[futures_of_ash]

O_o

It's generally unappealing, being raw and sentient...but if you insisted, it would no doubt fight the entire way down, up to and including doughy hook protrusions into the esophagus. Final death and break down into it's component pieces would occur after a reasonable amount of time in the stomach.

[52-dropoff.livejournal.com]

There go my lunch plans. :)

[futures_of_ash]

Meh, having a lunch not agree with you rarely stops you from eating neh? ;)

Wise choice though.

[guppy_sandhu]

Dude that is bizarre XD

In an awesome way.

[futures_of_ash]

*bows* have fun!

[whisper2ascream.livejournal.com]

Muahahah, dunno who I will toss towards this yet, but either way, I look forward to some fun reading even if I don't! XDD

[futures_of_ash]

I'll try to keep track and post a consolidated reading list in back for you!

[longlonghair]

D: I will not be around to participate sadly, but I look forward to reading the threads of those that do!

[futures_of_ash]

See above! We'll miss you!

[batyatoon]

... okay, I just have to share this fact.

Because all I could think of?

Was this.

[futures_of_ash]

Ahhhh...yesssss...it is alive! Less yeasty though...

...and this plot without mind control?

[will_scarlett]

I think I'm going to have to send her graininess that way, she will be very, very confused.

[futures_of_ash]

We encourage confusion *nods* And group confusion!

[bodldops.livejournal.com]

My only comment being:

I love you people.

Lots.

<3

[futures_of_ash]

Yay, loves! I am collecting this wondrous emotion *bottles*

[mistressmaryquitecontrary]

Um. Question.

Mary's been out for a while at boarding school, but I'm planning on bringing her back something this week or next . . . could you maybe specify a little more on 'taking over the greenhouse'?

[futures_of_ash]

Alrighty!

Our two factions are going to chase each other through the kitchens and outside, then to the warm, moist environs of the greenhouse. There they will divide and build their ranks. So, dough in the air vents, dough crawling among the plants, dough everywhere for a time!

Most of the main 'wars' are going to be over territory in the greenhouse, though outside is just a good a place to find the dough.

[mistressmaryquitecontrary]

Thanks for clarifying! Let me ask, then, since, uh, it seems like this will be pretty un-ignorable . . . how great a threat is the sentient dough likely to pose to a twelve-year-old who will be extremely unhappy about dough infesting her garden?

[mm_madb]

I can answer this: Virtually none. If she stood still long enough and if she wasn't looking (like, eyes closed), and if she was somehow paralyzed and couldn't use her hands by something not-bread-related it might be able to smother her.

But really the worst you're looking at is messy clothing and a really foul taste in her mouth if some of it hit her face and she had to scrape it off.

[mistressmaryquitecontrary]

Thanks!

So I guess my real question is, if I need to have Mary doing things in the greenhouse, am I cool just NPCing something like 'Mary is doing her best to scrub away dough'? or is it going to get more complicated than that?

[mm_madb]

It's all about the NPC'ing. You're free to have "Mary is whacking dough with her trowel", even. The dough is a limited-time, limited-power, everybody can use it NPC.