Daily Entertainment.

[muji]

I HAVE POWER AT MY HOUSE YOU GUYS. I WOKE UP AND I WASN'T DRENCHED IN SWEAT IT'S A ~MONDAY MORNING MIRACLE~.

Topic: What are the top 1/5/however many reasons you should hate the canons you play from? Examples below.

Comments

[muji]

Mal and Sallie: Too short - should have given me problems as far as adequate characterization, etc etc? Maybe? Especially with Sallie.
Carlisle: LOL I'LL JUST LEAVE THIS HERE, OKAY?
The Phantom: Oh my god, the early comics are really racist. Don't worry; I'll fix it. Or, y'know, just do post-Falk? IDK. I'll make it work.
April: ...Yeah, I don't ship April/Andy. Or more accurately, I didn't understand how they ended up together. They're okay now, but damn it was awkward to watch.

Aaaaaand Tenzin: All the unanswered questions. I'm going to get Jossed so hard.

[sky_child]

Aaaaaand Tenzin: All the unanswered questions.

As someone who used to RP from Lost, you have my deepest sympathies.

[sky_child]

YAY POWER! We were incredibly lucky, as all we lost was the internet for most of a day. Doesn't mean my area wasn't effected, either, cause I went grocery shopping yesterday and felt like I needed a flashlight to find the pepperoni! But yes AC is good, very good!

To answer your question:

1. The Imprisoned
2. The Imprisoned
3. The Imprisoned
4. The Imprisoned
5. The Imprisoned

Hey everybody guess who I'm stuck with again in my second playthrough?

Though it would honestly go more like, and in no particular order:

• Having to fight The Imprisoned at least three times. The other six times are purely optional! Granted you have to fight Ghirahim at least as many times (that being three), but at least his fights aren't frustratingly redundant and time constrained like The Imprisoned! And Ghirahim doesn't take up the whole fucking platform when you knock him down so that you have to run to a lower platform and then ascend to the higher platform behind him but OH NO YOU WERE TOO SLOW he's back up again and well I WOULD have gotten there on time if he hadn't TAKEN UP THE ENTIRE PLATFORM and *jabs Wii Remote forward repeatedly*


• Some really horrendous ideas that cropped up towards the end of the game, one of them being "lol lets fight the imprisoned 3rd time rite after zelda goes to sleep to seal him lololol", the other one being "lol lets prevent the player from advancing in the game until they clear a minigame/tutorial for a battle technique they will only use once in the game lololol". Oh, and the Scrapper escort mission. Although that one's not as bad as the horse cart escort from Twilight Princess.


• You need an accessory or a new Wii Remote to play it. :(


• IT'S A SEMI-CARTOON-Y STYLED GAME IT SHOULDN'T BOMBARD ITS AUDIENCE WITH SO MANY FEELS. I posted this image on Link's journal for a reason...


• Oh and then there's the whole thing about this being the prequel to all the Zelda games and thus having like a loooot of things that people refer to when discussing Zelda not apply to him and also just. All the Links and Zeldas. Why are there so many? It is hard keeping track of all ships since I don't ship them together in every game. T_T

[bcgphoenix]

Ugh, you lucky bastard. *eyes her neighborhood mournfully* At least the mini-storm last night cooled things off enough for me to open a window and sleep comfortably.

Canons!

BSG is so. relentlessly. dark that it's not even funny. I remain deeply fond of Sophie's summary: "The world ends. In episode two, things get worse." Also, things...kind of went off the rails in S4.5. I am one of those rare birds that actually liked the finale, but some of the ways they handled their ALL WILL BE ANSWERED proclamations were pretty damn weak. (Also, the mess that was Caprica/Tigh. Oof.)

Fringe has gross, gory body horror out the wazoo. Also, it can have a hard time striking a balance between the members of its ensemble. And I want the main ship to die in a fire I mean um.

SPN, what the hell is even up with your horrible treatment of women and minorities, I swear to god. >:|||||| Less egregiously: more gore/body horror.

[camwyn]

I would say something here about the Half-Life canon not being finished, but I live in terror of Valve publishing episode 3 and coming out with either a Hideaki "End of Evangelion" Anno ending or a Yoshiyuki "Kill 'Em All" Tomino ending, so.

[not_my_sandbox]

OMG STOP FIXING WHAT ISN'T BROKEN I WISH 2007 WOULD COME BACK &^#@%*^$(*@ RUINEDSCAPE JAMFLAX #($@&)*^$!

Nah, not really. If nothing else, I am extremely adaptable and patient about things. I am not really affected by canon updates though, except for the fact that may laptops become less and less capable of running the huge Java monster the game client is becoming. I guess most of that is because I am not a PvPer, or much of a PvEer. I just sit around fishing all day. Maybe if canon stopped updating I would be able to go post-canon crazy, but as it is, I don't mind messing about in pre-canon (sorta).

I worry a bit though, about boobplate and typical fantasy female mage 'armor'. One of the female concept artists for Runescape left to work on Jagex's Transformers game and things have been... meh

[not_my_sandbox]

ok, maybe the vanity outfits that have been popping up like mad that don't have anything to do with the game.

(yet? maybe? hopefully? I mean the game isn't strictly medieval, there are Dr. Frankenstein/mad scientist/steampunk/magical science/engineering element type things here and there *confused*)

[sdelmonte]

I don't know if any these are really reasons to hate my canons. And I don't want anyone to hate them, of course. But...

Knox: The Batman films (even the first one) don't exactly shine in terms of plot. Also, Knox doesn't come back. And the very existence of Joe Schumacher is problematic.

CharlieQuestion: His canon DOESN'T EXIST ANYMORE! And when it did, it was a muddled mess far too often. One that wasted his character by killing him while he was still interesting.

Gibbs: The Pirates films are troubling in how race is dealt with, especially at the start of the first film. And the fourth film was a mistake.

Cyborg: No explanation is ever made about how the Titans can afford to live in that tower, and rebuild it, and buy all those toys. And they really lose track of Slade after using him so well for so long.

Kirk: The TV show is often very dated, very sexist, and very silly. Shatner is sometimes a bit hard to take. The first and fifth films are lousy. And the show just doesn't portray a believable future (which is part of what I love, but get that many would hate that).

Howard Stark: His particular film spends too much time trying to decide if it's a WWII film with a superhero, or a superhero film in WWII. And the collected Marvel movies...no one hit for saying this but...they really could be so much better in terms of plots.

[gorgonfondness]

Lunar is a really dang easy RPG, so easy in some variations that I once beat the final boss while barely paying attention. I'm used to the Playstation version, where all of the bosses have stats based on Alex's current level and ensures every boss is a fair challenge. But there are two things I hate about Lunar:

-The yeti mini-puzzle. It's not hard to figure out what to do: lead the yetis into ice blocks so they can destroy them to clear your path. But what ends up happening is the yeti runs into you instead and you have to fight it or run away. When I'm on my 20th attempt on the same damn yeti, this gets pretty frustrating. Also, this is the very first real area of gameplay in the game. So on the upside, once it's done, you're friggin' done with it.

-Inventory space and management in the Playstation version. Everyone gets six weapon/armor slots and six item slots. (Except for Alex, who only gets five usable item slots since he has to carry around his ocarina. Seriously, that thing is required to beat the game.) In order to equip a weapon or armor, the character you want to carry it has to have one free item spot so they can hold it. From there, they can switch from their armor slots. No offers to buy back the now-useless armor or weapon from the shopkeep to make the transaction simple. This wouldn't be so bad if they did inventory management from Lunar 2 and group together like items, but no. If your character has six healing nuts, they take up all six item spots. Nall is essentially your inventory since he can carry several lines of items but even he runs out of space when you get to the endgame. And Nall's inventory is inaccessible during battle, unlike the shared inventory Ruby has in Lunar 2.

And ooooooh my pork, Mother 3. Did we really need all those player punches? Did we? Itoi, you make me cry so much. I'd complain about the lack of official U.S. release except the fan translation did such an awesome job. Well, okay, I will complain a little. Not So Fun Fact: Lucas is the only character in the Super Smash Brothers franchise whose featured game has not been released in America.

[sky_child]

Oh, the Mother series.

It is a sad series, full of sad stories and sadder IRL distribution.

[kd7sov]

PEGASUS. FAMILIES.

That is all.

And for Felix: C'mon, Camelot, talk to us! They release the first game, and then the second one about a year later. Then, for over five years, there is not a peep beyond the occasional "yeah, it'd be neat to do something like that". Then there is the announcement, and again no word for another year and a couple weeks, whereupon there's months of buildup and teasers for a frankly somewhat subpar game. And then... nothing. It's been over nineteen months since the US release of the third game, which was stuffed more full of sequel hooks than characters, almost, and yet... not a word.

[saphyria]

Sunshine: OH GOD the unanswered questions and the unreliable narrator. Srsly. What happened to Rae's father and his family? Was he or wasn't he a sorcerer? Was he a bad guy, or was that just Rae's mother's interpretation? How exactly does Con's lifestyle differ from other vampires? What's up with the Goddess of Pain? Is Mel secretly a sorcerer? Will Rae be able to keep her day job? *flails*

Old Kingdom series: Again with the patchy information. Nix fills in backstory, worldbuilding, and characterizations in bits and pieces, strewn throughout the plot, but never really tells enough to give a clear picture.

The creation story dealing with the Bright Shiners is vague at best, insinuating that there were once six other worlds connected by the Charter before the Destroyer got them, and that the Old Kingdom/what's left of the Charter is actually infringing on a magic-less world that was already inhabited. But it isn't really explored or explained more fully.

Characters don't get given much depth or nuance, even when they're main characters. Backstory and character growth aren't shown much - insinuated, yes, but not really ever shown. All the main characters change very little, over the course of the story (apart from maybe Lirael). Sabriel is dutiful and determined from page one, Touchstone is leaderly and strong, Ellimere is bossy but capable, Lirael is shy but dutiful, Sameth is clever but insecure. Mogget is a snarky jerk, and the Dog is friendly and wise (but also snarky). And those... are the main chararacters in a nutshell. Oh, it's insinuated that Ellimere learns not to be so bossy, and that Lirael gets over her shyness, and Sameth gets over his insecurities when he finds his true role, but it's never shown or ever really mentioned. Gah.

[boston_bruiser]

Well, let's see:

1. The length of Voodoo's canon. It's about five hours, and around two of those are spent with Voodoo's team.
2. The lack of characterization. The Tier One guys in MoH 2010 all show promise to be great characters, but Voodoo is by far the best-developed, and even then that's not saying much. I can make a list of everything that's canon about him (as opposed to what I have millicanoned):
- he has a tomahawk in a sheath on his back, and he uses it more frequently than he should
- he is incredibly hyperagressive, and no, that's not redundant, not in the least
- he has a South Boston accent
- he is AFO Neptune's machine gunner
- he is very close to Rabbit, the player character (as in he buddies up with him a lot and is the only one who actually gets on Bagram's case about not being able to send a medevac in time)
- he has been known to use an M4A1 carbine
- he has a SIG Sauer P226 in a cross-chest holster
- he dislikes Pashtun music with a passion ("Christ, Rabbit, turn. That. Shit. Off.")
- he has a scar running on from his nose to his right cheek
- he is a white adult male
- he is a SEAL, very likely from DEVGRU, judging from the context of the game's levels

Literally every single other thing about his character? I have either made up myself, extrapolated from how he behaves and talks in-game, extrapolated from how SEALs in general behave, drawn from retired SEALs and their accounts (I've found Dick Marcinko, Chuck Pfarrer, and Don Shipley to be great role models), from other military men I have known (such as my father), deduced myself (like his height of 6' 2" - I measured his M60 in one wallpaper that features him then scaled it up to match his height, but even that's basically just a guess), or made up myself, based on what I thought would fit his established character best (like the fact that he's the second of six siblings or he played varsity lacrosse in high school).

(Watch me get jossed when Warfighter comes out this October. And then watch me look for a fuck to give.)

John's canon: urgh. Get back to me when I've slept more.

[sky_child]

Five hours being too short or too long?

[1nv1nc1ble]

Invincible is part of the Image Comics Universe. This means that I have to take into account the majority of Rob Liefield's work as canon.

If you don't understand what this means, find someone who reads comics and ask them. Be prepared for a rant.

[bjornwilde]

Big Muscles, itty bitty feet.

[bjornwilde]

Ben Grimm (F4/FF/MU): In no specific order; cross overs, heroes fighting heroes, Fear Itself, the Worf effect, cross over time lines vs title story time lines.

Thalia (PJ&O/HoO): Jason having so many more abilities than her. I'm likely to spin it that her acrophobia is the reason but really Rick? The boy gets more powers than the girl?

Beast Boy (YJ): On Demand messing with what episodes it's having available. I'm like five episodes behind dang it.

Hank McCoy (XMFC): Did the team have to split up so soon? There are plenty of other X-villains, they could have stayed together for at least one more movie! Also Hank flying a super sonic jet and yet needs to wear glasses.

Kate Kane (Batwoman): I'd really like the present story line to wrap up. This is almost as bad as Hickman, it's been the same story for 10 issues now. Solve the damn crime! Also, where is Renee and what is the status with Charlie and/or The Question? Rumors are suggesting there are going to be two Questions (Charlie and Renee?) but damn it, get to it! Also beautiful art but can we stop the jumping around in time? It's getting confusing for me.

[minkhollow]

Villains By Necessity: There's a school of thought out there that thinks the book's a little too anvil-y with its overarching point.

Warehouse 13: HEY GUYS WOULD IT KILL YOU TO GIVE LEENA A LITTLE MORE TO DO. AND WHY ARE ALL OF THE OUT NON-STRAIGHT CHARACTERS (CURRENTLY) DEAD. (BEFORE THAT, WHY WAS THE ONLY OUT BI CHARACTER SUDDENLY EVIL.)

Percyverse: I still haven't watched the movie, partly in protest of the LOL HADES DID IT bit. That was not only one of the things I really liked about the first book, but it's... uh, kiiiinda crucial to the plot of the rest of it. I'm still wondering how they're going to pull off the Sea of Monsters movie with that setup.

Soul Music (since the Disc is too big to deal with on its own): Becca pointed out in her massive reread project that Imp doesn't have much of a personality before the music gets to him. One thing that still irks me is that he hasn't been so much as mentioned since then.

Harry Potter: I like the world, but the last couple books seriously went off the rails (Camping Trip from Hell rather than the really interesting stuff at Hogwarts, everyone taking turns wearing the cursed jewelry... part of me really thinks Harry should have stayed dead...). The epilogue in particular irks me; sure, Harry gets his Big Happy Family, but there are still plenty of signs that all is not as well as he thinks at the end. Please, JKR, this is a complex world; you can't fix everything that easily.

Once Upon a Time: The flashbacks aren't in chronological order, it would apparently be the end of the world to have more than one non-white non-Western-European character in the mix (though: 1) casting calls for S2 include an Asian princess and 2) this makes the fact they ended up in the whitest state in the Union REALLY FITTING), they introduce ALL OF THE PEOPLE and barely mention them again, they tried to make the heart of the story David and MM's AAAAAAANGST when, if anything, it's driven by Regina's issues, and WHAT THE FUCK WAS THE PURPLE CLOUD O' DOOM FOR, RUMPEL???? (If the most popular fan theory of why he did that is right, um, DUDE, THE BOUNTY HUNTER OWES YOU A FAVOR. THAT YOU INEXPLICABLY DID NOT CALL IN WHEN YOU SENT HER TO KILL A DRAGON. JUST SAYIN'.)

[aberration]

Mmmph...

Heroes - Eh. It's been like four years, I'm kind of outranted about this. How about "only show that's actually made me feel shitty as a person while watching"? Yes that sounds like a good way to sum it up.

Aaand... I don't actually have significant issues with my other canons. I'm not saying they're perfect, but, like, I don't know. Things like Tom/Ann on Parks and Rec might bug me, but it doesn't rise to a hate level. I feel like Heroes really blew out my hate-level gage.


In other news, I stuck a post-canon Asami (complete with post-canon OOM that is basically 'look, Veronica was studying evidence rules for the bar okay?') in m_m, if anyone's interested. But again, post-canon, so threads will likely be spoilery.

[bcgphoenix]

*looks left*

*looks right*

If you don't mind super-mega-slowtime through what will possibly the whole week, want a Bolin in that sandbox post?

[againsttherules]

The writer ended the second book in the series on a cliffhanger, with Jack here falling down an pit that apparently goes all the way to the centre of the earth.

And then there are the scientific issues I have expounded on before now (or not):
1) Sunspots are cold, not hot! also, they grow, change and vanish on a cycle with a length measured in days.
2) Also, earth with 6 vast shafts (apparently) going all the way to the core seems like it should collapse in on iself.
3) Diamonds don't come in perfect square/rectangles, and (this is lampshaded, I'll conceede) they should never have voids in them.

And then there are numerous historical inaccuracies.

What saves it? The author is quite willing to admit he made stuff up. He won't tell you which bits he made up. But, it's enough, he's not saying all this is based on fact.

[ceitfianna]

Saph did all the best rants for Old Kingdom but I just want to add, teen angst isn't character growth and how does Sam's magic work? How does he actually make things?

I don't have too many gripes about Will or Jane's canon.

When does Yuma happen? You didn't have to give us a specific time, that makes it more confusing.

Oh X-Men, your timescale is weird as is your world, also need a more diverse cast.

Moist wouldn't settle down unless he's getting something from it.

How long was Tumnus a statue? Talk to me about timing, Lewis. Was he aware during that?

Hee, Greek mythology, I don't even try there. Everything's canon and the Pirate King isn't meant to make that much sense.

[mnt_mike]

Turtles: Lack of consistently good female characters, continuity holes LEIK WOO, problematic racial/ethnic imagery and presentation, no where near enough Mikey characterization.

Middlman: ONE SEASON? THAT WASN'T EVEN FINISHED!? WHAT THE HELL IS THE PROBLEM WITH YOU, ABC FAMILY!

Wonka: Sketchy racial issues here as well.

Avatar: Book 3 has some pacing issues. Too much story, not enough time to get to it all. (Though...it's still better paced than Korra...)

[varadia]

The one unfinished season will NEVER NOT BUG ME. Argh.

[cameoflage]

Andrew Hussie likes to fuck with Homestuck fans' heads and sometimes outright mock us. It gets pretty annoying. Some of the author-avatar sequences seem like he's deliberately wasting our time, since they're ridiculous even for Homestuck and seem to have no bearing on anything.

[alas_a_llama]

Number one thing: Atton's canon is unfinished.

Not 'it ends on a cliffhanger' unfinished (although it does, so that too), but 'this product was not complete when it went on the shelves'. Entire storylines are missing. There's a massive gap between Telos Part 2 and Malachor V where something gigantic has presumably happened, since none of your party members are helping you or even appear to be around, and Bao-Dur has left instructions for his remote droid in a very 'If You Are Hearing This, I Am Dead' manner. What happened? Ha! Good luck ever, ever finding out.

The audio files literally have as much cut content in them as stuff that made it into the game. Things like: Two entire planets worth of plot; the entirety of Nar Shaddaa Part 2; important exposition between the villains; and almost all of the final planet.

[yakalskovich]

Teja's canon ('A Struggle For Rome') is almost unreadable because of the artificial bathos of its 19th century language now. It's available in English, on 'Project Gutenberg', even on 'Project Gutenberg' in English, and yet nobody here that I know of has even tried to read it. I don't blame them in the slightest. I wouldn't read it if I didn't like Teja that much!

Antinoos' canon ('Memoirs Of Hadrian') has become problematic in recent years due to a massive shift in values that now holds (among civilised people in the western world) that gay relationships are a good thing, but wildly asymmetric relationships are not. So while the book was considered risqué in the 50s when it was published on account of a homosexual relationship being at its centre, nowadays, the relationship at the centre if considered offputting because it's a powerful man in his late forties and early fifties falling for a beautiful nobody in his teens. That asymmetry is precisely what made a relationship like that acceptable in classical times, and the fact that a lessening of that asymmetry is starting to make it unacceptable is at the heart of Antinoos' problems, and his eventual suicide. Those are very, very shark-infested waters to navigate for mere RP.

Urquhart is never given a first name by his canon ('Death and the Devil'), and then there is the matter of the pumpkins on a market in 1260. But mostly, the author is doing it spectacularly unexpectedly right, his research is sound, he knows the place like the back of his hand, and he empathises with all his wonderfully flawed characters. Erm, sorry, I wasn't supposed to praise it...

Discworld is flawless and perfect.

People say that PotC4 was superfluous, but I actually quite enjoyed it.

Leonardo: too yellow!!! Otherwise, nothing wrong with it. What seems to be wrong is not a bug, it's a feature.

Sirona's canon is about German politics and wouldn't ever lend itself to translation, I fear. Also, it's been caught up with by reality now, as the Pirate Party is happening along the lines that hypothetical new party in the book does. Also, Andreas Eschbach never explains why Sirona sets all the events in motion and engineers that incredibly complex Xanatos gambit...

Marvel Universes of all description are just too friggin' huge for me to ever take in enough of them to officially lay claim to Lady Loki. I have no chance to ever catch up with the canon. And I'm dreadfully worried about the flak I feel likely to catch from the dyed-in-the-wool whole-geek fans if I even attempted to dip my toe in. You have to have grown up with that stuff, I fear.

[ihavemyflaws]

The street you have to turn off to get into our community has power, but not our community. :/

If anybody I was threading with happens to read this, I'll reply when my power's back.

[gavin62truck]

If you're prone to breaking easily, don't watch "Rescue Me" if you don't plan on sobbing uncontrollably when your soul is bludgeoned into a complete pulp. I don't necessarily hate that, but goddamn, this show can ruin your day. It's basically ANGST ANGST ANGST GRIEF ANGER DRUNKENNESS VIOLENCE DEATH ANGST ANGST ANGST. Really, you have to be able to withstand a lot of emotional abuse.

Oh and there's the occasional cringe-worthy plot arc and writing that makes you go wtf.

[ikissdhimbck]

2.12 nearly broke me, I won't lie. I think I'm hardwired to expect the season finale to pull all the punches (not that 2.13 wasn't ouch, it really was, but more in the aftermath of 12), so when the drama came an episode early I wasn't nearly as prepared as I should have been.

Jerry made me cry like a little girl. :(

[hey35andholding]

Reno has politically incorrect humor out the wazoo, and if you can't stand that kind of stuff you'll loathe the show. Also see: everything they did in the last season, which was a total disaster.

Brisco's practically perfect, and I can't think of much to properly critique it with.

Psych's about to solve a lot of the issues I find troublesome this season.

All of my problems with MLP ironically involve the fandom surrounding it.

[withherhands]

*looks over at 24 canon and sighs*