Daily Entertainment

[themightyspazz]

A day without sunshine is like...

...night. And stuff.

I crack me up, sometimes.

Today! A DE brought to you by gavin62truck!

If your pup(s) were a mixed drink -- alcoholic or non-alcoholic -- what would the ingredients be and how would it be prepared?

Alternately, what sort of figurative ingredients (like cheerfulness, brute strength, a love for sugar, etc.) would be involved in making a cocktail based on your pup? And what would be the effect/consequence of drinking such a concoction?

Comments

[themightyspazz]

I'll go first.

To make a Voodoo, you combine sake, tequila, Jack Daniels, Jim Beam, Smirnoff, ambrosia, arak, and Captain Morgan with whatever else you and your neighbors have got in your liquor cabinets. (How you access your neighbors' liquor cabinets is up to you.) The more exotic, the better, but no gin, brandy, schnapps, or wine of any sort.

Then you light that shit on fire and either a) drink it, b) throw it on the ground and crush the glass under your heel, or c) splash it in the face of the first stranger to make sexual advances on your sister(s).

Making a John Marston is much simpler. (And is also much less likely to get you arrested for aggravated assault, but one thing at a time here.) Just mix pulque, brandy, and whiskey, and put it all on the rocks. Top it off with one of those fancy little umbrellas if you're feeling dainty.

Making a Mako is even simpler. Just mix four parts brandy to one part Dr. Pepper.

(I've never made cocktails before, okay?)

[genarti]

...Oh my god, the Voodoo one sounds foul. *dying* Like, that is the most disgusting drunk-frat-boy-emptying-the-liquor-cabinet drink I can imagine.

That may be intentional.

[genarti]

The River Tam: one part Chambord, one part crème de cassis, two parts champagne. Garnish with an edible flower and a small plastic monkey or other novelty. Sweet, bubbly, pink, and has more of a kick than you might realize.

Alternately, the River Tam: put frozen strawberries, raspberries, blackberries, and any other fruit you have handy in a blender with crushed ice and a splash of lemon or lime juice. Smoothie it up! Add a hefty splash of rum (for piracy!) if you want to add the kick. Either way, garnish the heck out of it. Yes, this is basically a daiquiri with a different name.

The Thor: probably exists, but whatever, I'll make up my own. I want to combine mead and Goldschlager somehow for symbolism -- drop a shot in? -- but I suspect that would taste disgusting. Anyone who likes mead want to weigh in on whether I'm correct in that guess? It's too sweet for me.

Lacking that: equal parts apple brandy, cognac, and bourbon, with a dash of lemon juice, served in a highball glass. Float a 'cup' of lemon rind on top, filled with brandy, and light it on fire just before serving. (Unnecessarily fancy, but Thor's Asgardian, so that is how we roll.) Sip judiciously, or get knocked flat.

The Regan Tam: something involving white wine. I kind of want to just rename a Bellini and have done with it, except maybe with the wine not sparkling. So, sure: peach puree and white wine, stirred gently. Serve in an aesthetically appealing wine glass.

The Clare: Oh lordy. Uhhhh. I will have to ponder this! Something clear or very pale, relatively simple, and potent.

...Actually. Make a gin and tonic, heavy on the tonic, lime optional. Whenever you get bored or the level gets low, add another splash of gin, preferably from a friend's drink or liquor cabinet. (Eventually, you may get drunk enough to not care if you splash in the wrong kind of alcohol. That's also acceptable.)

The Trowa Barton: Black coffee.

[bjornwilde]

Mead and Goldschlager seem like they would mix great. My only worry would be it being too syrupy.

[1nv1nc1ble]

Perhaps now is the time to point out that there is a brand of vodka called "Thor's Hammer". (I've also seen one called "Mjolnir," which may be the same stuff, renamed for marketing purposes. It was in a bottle shaped like the traditional Norse image of the hammer.

Of course, the irony of getting drunk (i.e., "hammered") on something named after the hammer of the God of Thunder is thick enough to spread on toast like Marmite.

[ask_the_right_questions]

Are you aware of the god of Thunder?

[saphyria]

Sunshine: Heat apple cider on stove (not boiling) before ladling it out into the glass. Add a small measure of vanilla schnapps as well as a single caramel candy, and stir gently with a cinnamon stick until caramel is melted. Garnish with a disfunctional need to help people. Serve hot. Alternatively, replace cider with hot apple tea. This drink may result in a tentative but warm belief that things might just turn out all right.

Yrael: Add green food coloring to a glass of Everclear. Set drink on fire. Do not drink, or even look directly at it. Clean up all the broken glass, then get out another glass and some milk from the fridge. Pour a glass of milk, and drink it.

Zelgadiss: Fill a salt-rimmed glass half-way with ice that's had its faith in the inherent goodness of the world crushed (or just crushed ice). Pour Sprite or another lemon-lime soda into the glass until it's 3/4th full. Add a shot of blueberry vodka in an enigmatic manner, and the juice of one rather snarky lime. Finish with a twist of stubborn hope.

[death_gone_mad]

Yrael's not!drink needs magnesium strips added as garnish for extra Do not look directly at it or else you'll go blind flair

[death_gone_mad]

Amascut: BIG HUGE WARNING DO NOT MIX AND DRINK THIS ALCOHOL AND BARBITURATES SHOULDN'T GO TOGETHER EVER

That said... Tequila and amobarbital (also known as Amasust. Thanks, Wolfram|Alpha, for putting the idea in my head).

[abitofawildman]

The Raph - Sink a shot of Jack Daniels into a Sam Adams.

The Mike - A chocolate milk shake with a pot brownie chaser.

The Splinter - Is really just Momokowa Pearl sake served at room temperature.

The Bumi - Take the mat from under the mixing station of any given bar, wring it out into a glass, and dare someone to drink it.

[a1enzo]

EW EW EW I really need to tag Bumi sometime.

[misslucyjane]

Figurative ingredients, just the currently active pups:

The Green Man: 1 part patience, 1 part amusement, 3 parts everybody's dad, 5 parts Father Nature. Serve with a slice of apple.

The Captain America: 3 parts courage, 1 part adorkability, and 1 part friendliness. Pour into a big heart, blend well.

Slender Man: 5 parts fear, 1 part white text. Serve in a skull.

[bjornwilde]

The Clobber-tini: One pint Hefferveisen with a slice of orange squeezed in and a shot of bourbon on the side. Must be served with a Pastrami Rueben.

The Venom Blast: Mountain Dew, Red Bull and Vodka. Best served with corn chips and guacamole.

The Beast: I have no idea what would be in it but it would be clear until after the first sip when the contents mix and turn the drink blue.

And that's all I've got.

[a1enzo]

I'm not sure, except it should be green and include Sprite! Any suggestions?

[sunbaked_baker]

Sprite, sweet and sour mix, and some blue curacao to make it green? :D

[genarti]

Sprite, Midori, and bitters*, with a twist (or a lot) of lime?

Or green apple schnapps, or something. Midori's melon-flavored and very fruity; I like the computer pun of something apple-flavored, but it depends on the flavor you're going for.

*I'm not sure of any bitters that are green, but I know there are a bunch of kinds. There ought to be something that's at least clear or pale yellow to not interfere. If you get something quinine-based, you can make the argument that the medicinal history is a nod to being a Guardian.

[1nv1nc1ble]

The Alien Secretion is Midori, Malibu rum, and pineapple juice. It is a most distinct shade of green. (It's also pretty tasty over ice.) Add Sprite for fizz.

[rowanberries]

The Vetinari: It doesn't matter, as long as you continue to act totally sober no matter how many you drink.

Canon, baby.

The Havelock (yes, that's different!): A cup of strong, expensive coffee, with a shot of single-malt whiskey added for every shenanigan you and/or your significant other have become embroiled in lately.

The Harth: A warm mug of blood or blood-substitute, liberally laced with cheap tequila. Serve with a bendy straw.

The Jack Harkness: A small tumbler, filled one-third with cold water. Drink like it's vodka, and act accordingly.

The Sabriel: Warm spiced red wine to ward off the chill of a) snow, and b) Death.

[genarti]

I think Jack's may be my favorite of this entire DE.

[1nv1nc1ble]

Well, Mark's signature drink is a Coke float with chocolate ice cream, but that doesn't seem like an "Invincible" to me. Maybe Red Bull, with Blue Curacao, layered to resemble his uniform.

[waco_jim]

"Wait a minute, mixed drinks? Those are a thing?"

[1nv1nc1ble]

"You could mix bourbon with bourbon."

[gavin62truck]

A Tommy Gavin Cocktail:

1 part Rage
1 part Lust
1 part Addiction
3 parts Guilt
a fuckton of Angst

Mix all ingredients in a shaker and throttle with frustration and anger. Pour into a tall glass. Set on fire.

Side effects may include assholery, never learning from your mistakes, and repeatedly disappointing your loved ones.

[battle_butler]

An Alfred: http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m462zlz0421rngjrso10_r1_1280.jpg
Just ignore the fact it's called the Coulson, the same applies, though he'd probably recommend taking out the vodka and triple sec, in favour of more gin and cointreau.

(also ignore the fact that Cointreau is a brand of triple sec, okay?)

As for the figurative:

1 part determination
1 part shrewdness
1 part subtlety

Shake well, leave in a military environment for a decade or so, then add a dash of wisdom.
Garnish with love.

[balancingminds]

I've been stuck on this one most of the day, mixed drinks are hard and I like drinks.

For Charles, I think the drink that would suit him would be tea with whiskey in it if not scotch. Though I love the idea of something that seems quite polite and then you take a drink and it knocks you on your back since he's powerful and doesn't show it.

Moist's needs to be something that tastes different on every sip.

And I have no ideas for the others, I blame lack of sleep but would love suggestions.

[bjornwilde]

For Charles, a Long Island Iced Tea or a variation there of?

[havetubawilltravel]

A Clementine is just pure mescaline with vanilla extract in it.

There's literally a Pinkie Pie drink! I think Leesha posted it awhile back.

A Dixie would be a Parisian Blonde.

The Juliet is one tall bottle of crisp, cool Canadian beer.