Weekend Entertainment

[fantasticfireferret]

Let's switch it up this weekend.

I've been playing a lot of Assassin's Creed III lately. The protagonist, Connor, is an Assassin. (It's very much a proper noun in this context. Also he has the shittiest dad ever - and I do mean ever - but let's not get ahead of ourselves here.)

Anyway. The central premise of the Assassin's Creed franchise is that there are two orders that have been fighting each other ever since humans were walking on two legs - the Assassins and the Templars. Each of them seek to create a perfect world, but they have radically different methods. The Templars seek to save humanity from itself through force, control, and the destruction of free will, while the Assassins fight tooth and nail for the preservation of self-determination and individuality.

My question for you is: would your pup be an Assassin or a Templar?

I doubt anybody's going to go Templar (it's basically in-game code for hey, I'm a giant tool!) but it's worth a shot.

Comments

[a1enzo]

Yeeeeah, Assassin. He'd view the Templars as a type of virus.

[adiva_calandia]

Heh, I've been watching my roommate play that! I may tackle it myself now that I've finished ARkham City.

. . . Yeah, I'm trying to figure out if any of my pups would be Templars. The Queen of Fairies, who I played for a hot second a while back, is probably the only one.

[katyafeline]

Most of mine, like most pups I'm sure, would be Assassins.

Katya wouldn't. She really, really wouldn't.

Also, I'm watching 'War of the Worlds' and a) omg wtf bbq augh and b) I find it hilarious that most/all of the acting in this movie is people going 'omg wtf bbq augh'.

[death_gone_mad]

Amascut is pleased with this pro-assassin, anti-templar propaganda. YAY FREEDOM FIGHTERS!

Even though she is supposed to be neutral as long as both sides are killing the shit out of each other, she falls a bit on the chaotic side. A bit.

[stuck_mynock]

PFFT HAYTHAM IS AWESOME WHAT ARE YOU SAYING.

Anyway.

Atton would be an Assassin. That one's a no-brainer. Not only is he actually a former small-a assassin (although in a sweep of irony, working for the Sith, which would've made him a Templar at the time), but he represents the philosophical position of anarchy, which is all about free will.

As for the rest of them - probably not either! Teddy strongly disapproves of any group which works outside the law and public eye; Leonardo, Leo and Seamus would just be the dudes who make hidden blades and smoke bombs and stuff.

Which, you know. In Leonardo's case, an alternate version of him does that anyway.

[fantasticfireferret]

NO HE'S NOT HAYTHAM IS A GIGANTIC TOOLBAG

OKAY SO HE SNARKS AT CONNOR WHEN HE DESERVES IT BECAUSE CONNOR IS DUMB BUT HE (WHITETEXT SPOILERS) PASSED BY CONNOR'S PRISON CELL WITHOUT SO MUCH AS A HELLO, THE DICKWEED

AND THERE WAS THAT THING IN THE ABANDONED CHURCH, LIKE, "HI DAD", "HELLO SON, YOU HAVE NO CHANCE TO SURVIVE MAKE YOUR TIME"

I JUST REALLY HATE HAYTHAM FOR GETTING ME SO INVESTED IN HIM FOR THE FIRST THREE SEQUENCES THEN TURNING AROUND AND BEING A TEMPLAR

I REALLY

REALLY

REALLY

HATE HIM

Then again I'm only on Sequence 8 so I don't know the full extent of his character arc.

[stuck_mynock]

IS IT THAT HE IS A TOOLBAG, OR ARE YOU JUST JEALOUS THAT YOU ARE NOT AS STONE-COLD MEGA-AWESOME AS HIM.

I THINK IT MAY BE THE LATTER.








he is a little bit of a dick.

[fantasticfireferret]

Just a little.

[stuck_mynock]

Charles Lee looks like Timothy Dalton and George Galloway had a child.

He haunts my nightmares.

[fantasticfireferret]

I keep expecting him to burst into song.

[stuck_mynock]

Now he's just going to be a singing Dalton-Galloway hybrid.

Why.

Why would you do this.

[fantasticfireferret]

I think a better question would be why wouldn't I do this.

Muahahaha.

[stuck_mynock]

You are neither a gentleman nor a scholar.

You are cruel.

[fantasticfireferret]

I'm a bad, bad man.

Now hurry and fetch me a redheaded stepchild to devour.

[stuck_mynock]

D:

[fantasticfireferret]

I like the ones with freckles.

Well, don't just stand there, mush.

[saphyria]

By commenting with that journal, you are changing my headcanon for Make drastically.

*edges away from him* >__________>

[fantasticfireferret]

"It's not my fault! My mun's crazy!"

[sunbaked_baker]

*dry* Tell me about it.

*offers cinnamon rolls*

[fantasticfireferret]

Calling this right now:

Voodoo and John would both be hardcore Assassins.

Mako...I'm not so sure about. I get the feeling if remaining neutral wasn't an option, he'd be an Assassin.

[gorgonfondness]

Mia's conflict in the Lunar series is similar to this and she was firmly on the Assassin side. Which was rough since the Templar side was her father figure growing up.

I'm pretty sure the others I play now would also be Assassins, but I can think of two I used to play who make this more interesting. When I had him, Nash (from the same canon as my Mia) was firmly Assassin but did some switching back and forth between that and Templar. However, his motivation was to protect both himself and Mia. But yeah, Nash is a giant tool sometimes.

And Farley Flavors would've been Templar for sure. He was essentially controlling Denton through reality tv before reality tv became the thing it is today. Everyone was buying his fast food, watching the shows he sponsored, and were swept up in the wave of his Faith Factory, which had the goal of bringing mental health back to the nation. His brand of mental health is......actually, not too far off from the likes of the Tea Party, now that I think about it.

Well played, Farley. Well played.

*heads down the DTV trail to Dentonvale*

[camwyn]

Of all of mine the only one likely to end up on the Templar roster would probably be Medic. Zira works for a Templar, though. Dr. Zaius and 9/10 of the rest of the upper echelons of Soror society are all hell-bent on civilization being as close an imitation of everything that civilization was before them as apely possible; that's as close as we're gonna get.

[saphyria]

Yrael is all over free will like white on rice. Sunshine, too.

All of mine would likely be Assassins, really. Though Sunshine would probably make the worst Assassin ever - she'd be good at what she does, but probably hate herself for it.

[bjornwilde]

Yeah, all of mine would be assassins with the exception of Palamedes. Ben and Hank would hate themselves while they killed but do it as they didn't see a better way; Hank would constantly be looking though. Jessica would be the best of my bunch in this return to assassination while Thalia would have a hard time with the sneaking around.

Palamedes would begin as an assassin but eventually walk away from the whole thing and disappear, refusing to play, having his fill of death.

[auraofmystery]

Mac wrote the book about being a Templar.

No, really.

Look, it was satire, all right? It's not his fault people in the future are idiots.

[shinyhappygoth]

<3

I had to submit a complaint at the Spy Museum for their failure to mention that trifling detail.

[ceitfianna]

Let's see all of mine would be on the side of the Assassins but not all of them would be actual Assassins.

Will would make a good Assassin as would William.

Sameth and Charles would be on the Assassins' side but neither of them are really best for the front line fight. Sam can fight but he's better at making things and Charles doesn't approve of violence.

Moist would try and be neutral and not get mixed up in everything but still would.

Jane would be living amongst it and quietly for the Assassins.

Demeter is a goddess and would try to stay above it.

Tumnus is another one that would help but not be on the front lines.

The Pirate King would be boisterously for the Assassins.

[petraarkanian]

Good question...

Petra might lean more towards the Templars, though only slightly. I can easily see her swinging the other way.

Skysong would be an assassin, she likes freedom.

Momiji wouldn't be either. I have this view of him in my head that fits his rabbit form- "NO! don't hurt each other! Let's be friends and have a group hug!"

[rowanberries]

...Uh.


Look, Lord Vetinari is a complicated person.