ways_back_room | DE: Uh-Oh, you shouldn't have done that...

In news that will surprise precisely no one: if it's this guy that goes, the bar is completely, entirely and irrevocably fucked.

Turning it around; if any of the others go beserk, the bar is not fucked at all...unless Banner gets pissed off with them, and then we're back to square one.

Not necessarily.

The gods of the Belgariad/Malloreon canon are capable of translocating people and objects to anywhere they can conceptualize, and we have one, Eriond, in the Bar. As long as he was around Bar could get a reprieve.

(Theoretically the Belgariad/Malloreon gods are also capable of turning people into animals without a problem, or holding back an entire onrushing ocean with Will alone, but I'm going with the assumption that the angrier Hulk gets the stronger he gets and that there is no upper bound on Hulk's anger, so sooner or later the holding-back would become a problem and require UL, who's the Belgariad equivalent of the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. As for turning him into something harmless I'm almost certain that you'd wind up with a rage-fueled Russian hamster chewing through mountains, or a jellyfish that could waterjet propel itself at hypersonic speeds through anything that pissed it off, so really translocating him to another planet until he calmed down is the way to go. Somewhere nice, with marshmallows and bunnies.)

Well, yeah - it's already been proved that given strong enough defendants, the Hulk can be contained. Or at least distracted long enough for him to turn back into Bruce. But the question was based on 'your other pups are the only ones who can stop them', so I went with, eg, 'Gene goes nuts and shoots Bruce B: Hulk smashes him to pieces: other pups = screwed'.

If the rest of the bar can take him down after he's killed Gene, then I'm sure Molly and Thor would be up for another go, and of course Eriond would be able to find a way too...and now, of course, I want the Hulk to find himself on a planet of marshmallows and bunnies, only they might make him even more angry as, no challenge.

/mad ramble

Fair enough!

... and now I'm trying to picture the marshmallow bunny planet and all I'm picturing is the Team Fortress 2 Meet the Pyro video, where PYRO thinks it's a planet of marshmallows and bunnies but everyone else is running screaming in fiery exploding terror.

And Jess pops up and offers lots of soothing pheromones.

(Sorry, couldn't resist.)

And then they eat sandwiches.

And peanut butter goes everywhere!

Hm.

With Joshua and Helena, it depends on what Artifact they got a hold of to go nuts, or if Helena is in Time Travel Mode again. Either of them could probably de-whammy the other, or Joshua could likely talk Helena down. She'd be the worse of the two, as she knows martial arts. Joshua's about as dangerous as a wet noodle. (Now I'm imagining the trident in the bar, and I'm more than a little frightened.)

Fantine... I'm a bit out of cheese at the thought of Fantine going nuts. She'd probably just yell at people.

Valentine would find a way to tear down everyone's reputation, spill everyone's secrets, and not give a shit... until someone talked her down.

Erm, not very, though there is some potential, at different points in canon.

With Max and Erik, either of Alfred or Jack can take them down relatively easily, Alfred can be taken down by Jack, though it might take some effort (and/or a distraction from one of my other pups).

Bean as a kid, could probably be dealt with by any of my others. Once Bean grows up, he would probably require all of mine to stop if he really got on a rampage, but he could be stopped.

And Jack. For, oh, 95(+)% of Jack's life, Alfred + a distraction, could take him down. But, in the period between the end of the first book of canon and the start of the second, he is a literal walking deus ex machina. You fire a gun at him, the gun explodes in your hand. Throw a punch, you break your wrist on his face. so, um, during that period? The bar would be fucked. Oh so very very severly screwed if Jack went berserk during that time frame.

Ace: ... With Balthazar on board, it becomes a case of two pups with sufficiently advanced technology appearing as magic (just one calls it science, and the other calls it magic). Fifty-fifty coin toss, depending whether Ace leans more on her training or more on the Cheetah, and whether she figures out that without his ring, Balthazar can't do much at all. Katya could help (and would be particularly effective if Ace leaned towards Cheetah) but against Gallifreyan technology? She'd be no good.

Katya: The bar is actually kinda effed. She works with a skillset that is very specific and very specifically countered. Balthazar would be able to help, but Katya would figure out very quickly that the man's using a talisman to fight, and then Balthazar would lose that hand entirely to a tiger. Sooooo there's that. Sorry bar, man-eating tiger on the loose.

Haymitch: Fairly easily controlled, but I'm sure he'd do damage while going down. However, he's not trained, and not in training - Glorfindel could take him alone.

Glorfindel: .... by himself? Balthazar, Ace, and Katya have a good chance of stopping him before any damage happens. If he, say, took one of the Three before going on a rampage... erm. Welp. It was nice knowing you, bar. All shall love him and despair. Balthazar would get outranked fairly quickly, Ace has no defense against real actualfax magic, and Katya is too like creatures he already knows how to fight without a ring.

Balthazar: ... Katya wins that fight, but only just.

Blakeney: Oh kiddo, you know I love you, but... yeah, he wouldn't get far. He could take out Clara/Oswin.

Clara/Oswin: ... yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah. Poor Life Choices Girl isn't going to get far. Oswin might a bit, depending on how complicated she makes her computer defenses. But she's going up against a Time Lord (albeit a slightly crazy one).

Jemma: Did someone give her access to a lab first? 'Cause if they did, she'll have half a chance, but Glorfindel looks too human for her to have realized it, so any toxin she dreams up probably won't be as effective on him, and then she's going down. If there's no lab involved, this is going to be a short fight.

Bones: ......................................................... Oh Bones. Yeeah, no, don't worry about him. I know honey, you're a doctor, not a soldier. It's okay.

*eyes pup roster* Ellen, Gordon, Shephard, Mordin, Varric, Pentecost, Santo, Medic. Next month, probably adding Edward Kenway.

If they go berserk in the bar without weapons on hand, Santo and Pentecost are the two most dangerous of the roster. Pentecost is a master MMA fighter who developed the martial art form used by Jaeger pilots. Santo is a champion wrestler, and within the context of his canon movies, he's the best wrestler in Mexico (lucha libre is as scripted as American pro wrestling, but the fighters get more freedom to throw down as they see fit so long as the outcome is the one called for at the end). And since he's a wrestler capable of defeating Martians, the entire roster of Universal Studios movie monsters (although it's 'El Vampiro' and 'Franquestain' rather than Dracula and Frankenstein's Monster), and an army of goons belonging to Aquiles the Moon Nazi, he'd be kinda dangerous if he went nuts. However, he's not bulletproof, and neither is Pentecost, so.

If they had weapons, Ellen would be the biggest problem in terms of immediate damage. She has access to the equivalent of Davy Crockett nuclear rifles, plus her dirtybomb grenades, Tesla cannon, and Gatling laser. However, her power armor only provides limited protection against EMPs, so that could be used to stop her. Shephard and Gordon are probably bigger problems; Shephard because he's already pretty much compiled basic plans on how best to go about killing anybody he encounters at the Bar (just in case), and Gordon because oh God interstellar empires couldn't stop him, what makes you think you can.*cough*

And if Medic's going berserk, you can bet Cata's going to step in. (Why no, she doesn't care if it defeats the purpose of the question, why do you ask?)

Ahahaha.

So Carol goes crazy because, I don't know, comic book science, so now one of the most powerful superheroes on Earth (at least on Earth 616) has to be defeated by Lady Mary Crawley, an aristocrat with absolutely no fighting skills, and Stiles Stilinski, mouthy teenager with a baseball bat. Their best chance would be talking her out of it, otherwise, sorry bar denizens, you're all screwed.

Edited (homonyms!) 2013-11-12 15:13 (UTC)

Depends on how much prep he has, and if he has the presence of mind to be stealthy about it. He'd try to turn people against one another, dredge up painful things, and quietly canon puncture as many people as he can by explaining things that he has no way of knowing otherwise. Hello, death days!

Overall, he'd probably just tantrum: he'd throw grenades, coat his hands with a fast-acting poison to which he's immune, and set things on fire, taking a vulnerable, used-to-trust-him hostage if he has the chance.

The mess would be contained in roughly ten minutes, when someone squashes him for handling either scenario clumsily.

Edited 2013-11-12 15:22 (UTC)

Is it bad that part of me wants to see what would happen if Valentine and Autor really decided to be subtle and sneaky against each other? I am amused by this thought.

That is not even remotely bad; nay, that is the opposite of bad: awesome and potentially terrifying. Valentine would win any competition unless Autor took lessons from Hannibal. Otherwise it'd be riddles and passive-aggressive notes and fancying himself Peter when he's got as much substance as cotton candy.

Related: headvoice!Autor is sooo embarrassed that the first time they meet is--of course!--when he's ballin'.

Valentine is finding him highly amusing for some reason, and will probably talk to him again when he's not nuts.

... no, they're not allowed to have a mini-note-war in the bar. Oh help us all. *FACEPALM* When Valentine is amused, man. She's terrifying.

True, we don't need notes. We have the T-minuses for that. *solemn*

*snort* They're going to end up doing something with that, arent' they?

Naturally. <3

Hannibal will always gladly offer lessons. To both sides. For his amusement.

Short version: The guy in my icon is one of three pups of mine who'd pose a problem to anyone except maybe each other, the other two being Max Mercer and Ryûk. The shiki is probably the hardest to beat, since he's truly immortal (not just emortal) while he's still got extra years on the clock, and since, if anyone gets close enough to take his Death Note away, he's got a fair shot at writing their name in it first. (And Rule X.1 says that suicide is always a valid cause of death, so he could, for instance, cause the Donighal to self-destruct.)

Well, if Amascut went nuttier than usual, the bar would be torched and the survivors hunted down like the ungrateful monsters they are. A squad of gods will have to take her down or chase her out with a basket of cute fwuffy kittens. The kittens will have to be of the non-flammable variety, unfortunately. So too the basket and the person(s) holding it.

I thinks there was a DE a while back were I stated Fairy Fixit's defensive capabilities, and Cam clarified them by saying that it amounted to something that could cause a The Last of Us scenario. Magical Cordyceps! Weeee! I don't know what could stop that if she went beserk; maybe if she expends her efforts on someone with an excellent immune system? Maybe a quarantine? That being said, Amascut knows how to dispose of fungus infested specimens very quickly and effectively without letting the spores drift about in the air.

A berserk Evil Chicken might provide a challenge for a single person, but not an insurmountable one. He usually calms down after dying.

Edited 2013-11-12 15:29 (UTC)

This could be interesting, if messy.

For the most part, if any of mine lost it, Moiraine's trained to handle such situations, so the odds are good she'd be able to help pull things back under control very quickly.

If Moiraine lost it for some reason ... that'd be something entirely different (and more than a little terrifying, as far as I'm concerned). In that case, I think we'd be depending on the resourcefulness of Jack Sparrow, or on the Winter Soldier to take a distance shot that she never saw coming.

Val von Doom: A teleporting, force field making mutant who can move through time as well as space. Yeah, not so good. I can sort of see Andrea getting very lucky with a shot since she has wicked reflexes and a nose to catch a scent. Anton could chart where she'd most likely pop up next by looking at the probability lines. Quinlan likely can help with the Force and Brimstone could burn a wish. Okay, maybe it's not so bad.

Thalia Grace: Mad demigod with electricity powers. Sorry Thalia, you wouldn't be much of a problem.

Hank McCoy: Super smart and agile, still easy to take down. (Pats pup on the head)

Jessica Drew: If she remembers any of her training, her fear pheromones would be working over drive and she'd be attacking from the shadows. Val, Quin, Anton, or Brimstone likely would have the best chance of overcoming the flight or flight and putting a stop to the rampage.

Quinlan Vos: Jedi Master who is highly skilled in force stealth and force clock, and armed with a light saber. I guess the real question would be if he was thinking clearly enough to use any force skills. Assuming yes, it'd be up to Val, Anton and Brimstone; though Jess's pheromones could be very useful.

Anton Gorodetsky: Oh fuck. Ok, at one point in canon, he does sort of go off the deep end and gathers all the Light energy about him as he walked to face the supposed Boss monster and save the woman he loved. Sucking all the Light energy caused car crashes, humans broke down in depression and anger, and chaos reigned. The wake of destruction was near to a natural disaster and this was just with him gathering energy. I'd say Brimstone and Andrea would be the best to deal with him. Brimstone to distract and Andrea to take him out with a sniper shot.

Andrea Nash: Berserk were-hyena, wheee! Actually, she be handled pretty quickly with a force field (Val) and pheromones (jess), or Anton could calm her down, put her to sleep, or freeze her in time.

Mulan: Love you ~~girl~~ woman, but you would likely be easier to control than Hank.

Brimstone: For all his power, he'd be easy to take down. He is not a fighter, so his rampage would be unskilled and wild.

Edited 2013-11-12 16:27 (UTC)

The only one of my characters that the others would have any trouble subduing is Marceline, just because without sunlight she's largely indestructible and has a whole lot of powers the others don't. But her going 'berserk' usually means she's also not thinking straight enough to actually utilize her powers in an effective way, so... she also might just get in a fistfight with one of them long enough for Katara to freeze her in a block of ice or something.

The second closest would be Katara during a full moon, but fortunately she doesn't do that kind of thing if she can help it. And Marceline doesn't really have blood, and so would probably be unaffected. Everyone else may be powerful enough to make a fuss, but Marceline or one of the others could contain them.

I've only got the one pup right now, and Mark's a bit like the Hulk in his power scale. An angry Viltrumite is a dangerous thing; three of them (two of whom are Mark and Nolan) canonically punch through a planet. They don't have the scaling strength to rage that the Hulk has, but if Mark's cheese slipped off his cracker, he'd be a nasty handful. Though, as a young, inexperienced, and relatively unskilled fighter, the trained supers, like Carol and Jessica, could probably put him down. The collateral damage would be pretty unpleasant.

On a slightly related note, Gail Simone and Jim Calafiore (who did Secret Six) are about to publish a Kickstarter-funded book called Leaving Megalopolis that deals with how people survive an ersatz Justice League going insane. It'll be interesting to see how they deal with the !Superman.

Waid did that with Irredeemable. But he basically left the Plutonian as unstoppable. And to me, uninteresting.

My only truly dangerous pup is Cyborg. The sonic doodad can kill.

Everyone else, even my fighters, can be subdued quickly. But Cy? He's scary.

If Olga went berserk, and my pups were the only ones who could take her down, y'all are proper fucked.

If Vert went nuts, it'd be visions and hallucinations and headaches all around.

If John Silver went nuts, it'd be another day at M'ways. Same for Alex.

If Earl went nuts... If he was angry, there would be smiting. And nobody wants that. So let's say he's just tired of everyone's negative nelly attitude, so it's tacos and tamales for everyone. Even you Javert. Shut up and eat it.

If the Gecko went nuts, everyone would have bruises on their ankles from lizard kung-fu.

If Sherlock went nuts... Oh too late.

ETA: Vlad? Yeah, Olga could put him down. Olga would open a door to the Between and send him down to level four. Olga kinda wonders why no one's done that yet.

Edited 2013-11-12 19:42 (UTC)

Higher vampires are frightening but nothing a Grand Sorceress would have trouble with. And can I say how I love that we all use different words for the place the Others can travel to? You use Between, Katya uses Gloom and my Anton uses Twilight. I think it totally fits!

Also, I am reading the fifth book and Svetlana just accused Gesar of being Dr. House!

Edited (stupid typos...no I didn't curse at Olga, I'm more mindful than that.) 2013-11-12 19:49 (UTC)

<3 I'm half-afraid that my Olga has become something distinct from her canon. My pups tend to evolve, even when left alone in my head. I need to reread her canon again.

So many plots, so little time.

So, so many plots. = ]

My Anton is becoming his own thing as well, sort of a mishmash of both the movie and the books.

All of mine are human of varying degrees of ability. Nancy and Harry would be incredibly easy to take down, but none of the others would be a particular problem for the rest of my mob to overwhelm.

Henry and Lois are no threat. At all.

Tavi: urk, it depends when in canon he's from. His current point, people die before he's contained. Late/post-canon... er, yeah, bad shit, the Bar gets fairly fucked over (and being Tavi, he would probably literally go after Bar first) before someone stops him. Unless, per the rules of this DE, my last steps in early...

Eriond: ...................................................................

It's probably this guy, having had Phoenix break out of him. In which case, if it's only my pups, they're about as screwed as Write's pups with the Hulk. They could definitely kill him! But he'd just come back stronger. And they could probably kill him again! But then the same would happen again.

(In canon, this situation is dealt with by kicking him into the sun, where he constantly dies and is reborn but cannot escape.)

If it was one of the others - yeeeaaah, the Bar would be fine.

If Teja went berserk with his axe, or Hannibal went on one of his ruthless murder sprees (like the scene when he escapes in 'Silence of the Lambs'?), there would always be Sirona to take them down, or even Margolotta. If Margolotta had a vampirism relapse, the bar might be much worse off, with people being picked off quietly in corners and sucked dry. Hopefully, Sirona would be able to do something.

You missed out what'd happen if Sirona flipped out. Was that a brainfart, or is her losing it not a thing that could happen per our current understanding of the laws of physics?

My mind boggled at the idea of what would happen if she really flipped out. Something nonlinear and seemingly nonsensical with snakes and hot water stinking of sulphur and reality stepping sideways in entirely unexpected ways, and all the stars over the lake coalescing into a giant .gif animation of somebody flipping the finger...

Well, if Medusa loses it, the bar is mostly stone, so...

The others can handle themselves fine. Kait canonically DOES have a tendency towards berserk rage (always fun in a werewolf-type, but enough of my others are familiar with long-range weapons (even if in Delia's case this involves a hunting crossbow) that they could take her down.

In order from "somebody just sit on them, it'll be fine" to "OH CRAP EVERYONE IS SMITHEREENS":

Regan

Enjolras (although I have trouble wrapping my head around this one; he's such a cold planner)
River
Trowa (he and River are pretty equal, but he gets the edge of heavier ordnance if it goes down that way)

Clare
Thor

...At least Clare and Thor have decent odds of successfully keeping each other occupied!

With my roster, the bar has its best chances if Lohengrin is the one that goes berserk. He could take on quite a number of regular human comers but either Mia or Lucas could handle him on their own.

Mia has a lot of potential for widespread destruction but is a rather squishy mage. Lohengrin MIGHT be able to take her down but he'd still probably have to get lucky/wait for her to drop her ice shield so he could finish her with a well-placed arrow. Lucas could stop her with ease.

Post-canon Lucas, however, could put Milliways far beyond fucked. Mia and Lohengrin trying to stop him are ants trying to hold up a crushing foot.

Let's see, my fighters are mainly human so Will and William could take each other out but it wouldn't be pretty. Sameth's trickier but Will could get him or William could take a distance shot though he would be worried if he was acting like a berserker. He's father's one and I think Sameth has the possibility in him but it scares him. Will in terms of how he fights is always just on that edge but knows his limits. William wouldn't be too hard to take down.

The one to really be scared would be Charles since he's one of the most powerful telepaths in his universe. He lost it in a different way during the Slenderman plot and chose to get himself away from people, if he went the other way, um, he'd have to be knocked out, William could shoot him from a distance or Will could, Sameth could knock him out. Though if they couldn't, it would be bad.

Moist when he gets going isn't dangerous as a fighter but what he can make happen is impressive. But to stop him all you'd need to do is shut him up.

Jane and Tumnus don't pose much danger if they got out of control.

Demeter, run, run far away for she will bring Winter in her wake.

The Pirate King, any of my other fighters could stop him but I think the music would be the most annoying part.

Duo is squashed by the other heavy hitters. (Unless he has a Gundam.)

Coyote could easily toast Donatello and dine on turtle soup.

Ambriel would be able to put the beatdown on Coyote with some effort.

With planning, Coyote could take Ambriel. But if the angel just rampages, the situation would need someone like Thor or Michael or Eriond to step in.

A hypothetical crazed and probably drunker-than-usual Jim could destroy an awful lot of furniture and an awful lot of people. Until he ran out of bullets, he'd be just about impossible for anybody who isn't bulletproof to stop. And none of my other pups are. The only one with a chance would be Leela, and even then only if she were able to sneak up behind him.

Crazed!Leela wouldn't destroy the Bar but she'd be a major threat. Even if it were just straight-up fighting. If it were more of a slow-burning type of craziness, she'd probably set traps for people. Jim could stop her, Garyn might, depending on how prepared he was.

Kane's physical prowess is above average, but really if he went berserk in the bar it would probably manifest as an attempted coup. But that's assuming he has the presence of mind to plan one, which the prompt seems to suggest he wouldn't.

Caius is in good physical shape, but the others would subdue him.

Garyn (once he's back in decent physical shape, anyway) would be in a similar boat to Leela. But once he gets his corprus-induced super strength, none of the others combined could stop him without a gun. Which Jim has, fortunately.

If Bilbo, Lydia or Jack go berserk, the bar is not fucked much. Steve alone could easily subdue them.

If Merlin or the Ice King went berserk...well, a berserk magical user? Eep. Still, with Captain America around in the end it would work out.

On the other hand, one shudders to think the kind of damage a berserk Steve could do. Merlin might be able to stop him, and the Ice King might even be able to help, but the bar would probably be pretty fucked meantime.

As for Cecil, I guess that depends on whether you subscribe to the Cecil-Is-A-Human or the Cecil-Is-An-Elder-God theories. Me, I haven't decided yet, really. If he's human, then the bar is not fucked. If he isn't...well.

A very late tag from me on this topic.

Kreyu going berserk in the bar would be bad. REALLY BAD. Kreyu's natural form is bigger than a blue whale and she's got armor piercing teeth, an armored hide, claws, and a sharp tail. Throw in the ability to cast disintegrate spells.... *shudders* Annabelle would try and stop her but would die heroically after her probability twisting mojo bent reality enough to inflict a wound upon the mighty dragon.

Annabelle has scary weapon skills and the unconscious ability to make the laws of probability cry, but Kreyu could hold her down with one paw. *G*

DE: Uh-Oh, you shouldn't have done that...

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