weekend entertainment: holiday special

[herr_bookman]

From Aura:

If they aren't already, your pup is now in a questionably classic holiday special. Think Santa Claus Conquers the Martians or Nestor, the Long-Eared Christmas Donkey. What ridiculous peril is your holiday in and how does your pup save the day?

Comments

[bbq_platypus]

Waco Kid: It's Christmas time in Rock Ridge. Love is in the air, fake snow is on the ground, and everybody is prone to breaking out into fully-orchestrated bawdy holiday songs. But their merriment becomes imperiled when Howard Johnson's wife decides to arrange a new temperance-themed Carol Night! Christmas is in danger! Jim saves the day by spiking everybody's eggnog.

Leela: The TARDIS arrives on the planet Holidae XII, which is threatened by a psychic alien that feeds on Christmas cheer. Leela saves the day by stabbing its chief Santabot henchman and ripping its silicon brains out of its skull, thus giving the Doctor time to connect the repurposed department store speakers with his sonic screwdriver, creating the necessary resonant frequency to collapse the alien's Ice Palace of Doom. After that's done, the Doctor pops over to Mars and convinces Sutekh that his gift of death to all humans is not in keeping with the holiday spirit.

Kane: The Brotherhood of Nod steals Christmas from the rich, opulent nations of the West and redistributes it to the poor in the form of divination and immortality. Christmas is in no danger - rather, it has been liberated from a malignant and decadent ideology! One vision, one purpose! Ho ho ho!

Caius and Garyn: New Life Festival in Ebonheart is threatened by the vengeful ghosts of underpaid janitors, resentful from having had to clean up New Life Festivals past. The local Imperial priest devises a plan to banish them with an ancient ritual, using Caius as a representative of Old Life and Garyn as a representative of New Life. As they're discussing their plan, Garyn gets tired of it and hacks the ghosts to pieces with his daedric longsword. Caius gets a bottle of top-shelf Imperial brandy from the Emperor. Garyn has received the same pair of moderately-enchanted levitation trousers for three years in a row.

[death_gone_mad]

Hahahaha, brilliant!

[bbq_platypus]

One does one's best.

[minkhollow]

Oh, you mean canon?

[bjornwilde]

For Jess, I'm just going to leave this right here.

For Quinlan, the Star Wars Holiday Special comes to mind.

And my minds stopping there.

[bbq_platypus]

Goooooood, GOOOOOOOOOD...give into the horror...



Let it flow through you...



Wash over you...



Feel the POWER of the Dark Side (of late-70s variety television)!



It is useless to resist.



You, like George Lucas...



...have fallen under its power. Though sadly, unlike George Lucas, you are not also a billionaire.

[bjornwilde]

My God, that's as bad as the Ewok Adventure...but it did have Bea Arthur!

[bbq_platypus]

Now there's a question - which of those two is worse?

(My money's on the Holiday Special. Both bring the worst that Star Wars has to offer to the table, but the SWHS also brings the worst the Seventies have to offer. I can't imagine watching it without the Rifftrax).

[bjornwilde]

I'd have to watch both to determine that; which is oddly tempting. I've seen bits and pieces of both but never watched them in their entirety.

[bbq_platypus]

Both are an exercise in masochism. Though I highly recommend the Rifftrax for the Holiday Special. I'd go as far as to say it's the funniest thing the MST3K guys have ever done.

[bjornwilde]

Wow, the opening scene with the wookies is riveting. Cirque Du Soleil should have gotten credit though.

[bbq_platypus]

"Wow. Even in Modesto, is there really enough pot to make this happen?"

[a1enzo]

The North Pole operation's main computer system is infected by a virus. I can't decide if it should be the Krampus Virus or just the Naughty Virus, and whether it's just causing kids to be sent the wrong toys, or causing the toys to be made dangerously wrong, or what. (I'm open to suggestions here.) Whatever its exact MO, Enzo once again gets to save Christmas with extreme prejudice.