Daily Entertainment: Scandal Edition!

[damncompass]

Politics is scandal, Milliways, never forget that. And that's all I'm going to say on the matter. (I might elaborate later, if anyone cares about Connecticut scandals.)

So, Daily Entertainment.

Scandal! If your character were to be in the papers for some sort of scandal or another, what would it be? What would the headlines read?

Comments

[boston_bruiser]

NAVY VETERAN PUTS CONGRESSIONAL REPRESENTATIVES IN EMERGENCY ROOM

CHARGED WITH FOUR COUNTS OF AGGRAVATED ASSAULT

"THEY HAD IT COMING", HE SAYS

[the_force_abides]

HIDDEN JEDI SLAIN.

or perhaps better:
JEDI TERRORIST SLAIN, EMPIRE CONTINUES HUNT FOR REBEL CELL.

[last_kallig]

Oh good one! Poor Quinlan. After the events on the Black Talon Ibani's might read something like:

SITH SLAYS IMPERIAL GENERAL SEEKING ASYLUM, SENATE OUTRAGED.

[bjornwilde]

DRUGGED OUT JEDI is another one that could work for him thanks to canon.

Love Ibani's!

[last_kallig]

Thank you! Poor Quinlan getting drugged. *hugs him*

There will be much more...dramatic headlines later. Very dramatic, but they are all full of spoilers. So many spoilers.

[bjornwilde]

Actually, it already happened. In his first comic all his memories were erased by drug lords using the very drugs he and Aayla Secura were investigating. Fun times.

What's interesting is that in his amnesiac state he used force lightening and this was before any training with Count Dooku. Makes you wonder just where he learned the skill or are Dark Side skills instinctive for him?

[last_kallig]

*nods*

Wookiepedia states that Force Lightning is USUALLY aligned to the Dark side of the force, but apparently it's not an absolute. Interesting. I could see Quinlan having a natural talent for Dark Side skills, maybe even sorcery. (I don't THINK Dooku was a sorcerer, but I'm hazy on that part of the extended universe.)

[death_gone_mad]

HIGH PRIEST CAUGHT CANOODLING

Red haired nun left priest red faced
No such person in convent records, officials say

[fairy_fixit]

INDEPENDENT INQUIRY INTO TELEPORTER ACCIDENTS DEMANDED BY ABYSSAL SERVICES DEPARTMENT CUSTOMERS

[vorpatril]

Imperial Security Headquarters has sunk! Biocontainments in the water! Cetagandans involved! Treasure found!

[balancingminds]

MUTANTS EXIST! New York Geneticist rumored in connection. What's happened to Charles Xavier?

[morethanprops]

Who is Moist von Lipwig and why is he good for Ankh-Morpork?

[sdelmonte]

Kirk: Starfleet Captain Demoted

Knox: Does Reporter Know More about Batman Than He's Saying?

Howard: Tycoon Working for Secret Agency!

Cyborg: Pizza Parlor Food Fight Caught on Tape

Charlie: Is No-Faced Crimefighter Really Ancient Demon?

Gibbs: Turncoat Sailor Wanted for Piracy

[damncompass]

Joshua: Graduate Student Disappears in Unexplained Accident; Sister Left Orphaned and Devistated.

Helena: Youngest Child of Wells Family Catches Another Married Man!

Valentine: Demosthenes Revealed to be Underage Girl!

Fantine: Parisian Student Rumoured to have Abandoned Pregnant Mistress

Mark: Next on Buzzline: Vampire Welfare Queens Who are Compulsive Bowlers.

Peter: Yet Another Werewolf Mauling! Will It Ever Stop?!

[kd7sov]

Presupposing the existence of newspapers in the video-game worlds...

Felix would probably have something like Adepts: Above the Law?

Fluttershy: Canon did it for me.

Kain probably has too many to count, starting with his decision to almost single-handedly resurrect the Dragoon Corps and passing through his various in-canon actions (fun fact: being repeatedly mind-controlled can sometimes look like serial betrayal of those you love!).

[yakalskovich]

**snerks**

No comment.-

[1nv1nc1ble]

The one that would come back again and again would be: "CAN WE TRUST INVINCIBLE?"

[masterofgunfu]

SCANTILY CLAD KNIGHT THREATENS CIVILIAN AT GUN POINT!

[rotwood_reaper]

This actually happened to Rukia in canon:

DAUGHTER OF NOBLE FAMILY SENTENCED TO DEATH!

SHE GAVE HER SHINIGAMI POWERS TO A MORTAL?!

CAPTAIN BYAKUYA KUCHIKI: "WOULD GLADLY EXECUTE HER MYSELF"

[gavin62truck]

ALCOHOLIC FIREMAN HAS AFFAIR WITH 9/11 HERO COUSIN'S WIDOW

I tried summing up each season with a headline or two but it got too insane.

[misslucyjane]

This isn't canon but I like it anyway: MediAvengers. I particularly like this one, (link to bigass graphic), which includes speculation as to why the new Captain America looks just like the "actor" from the Forties. Not sure I could top that.

MAGIC EXISTS! King Arthur's manservant's deadly secret! Will Arthur forgive him?

RETURNED FROM THE DEAD! Missing gentry returns to Hobbiton after a year abroad...but where did he get the gold filling the halls of Bag End? BONUS: FRAUD! THAT'S NOT MY COUSIN! says Lobelia Sackville-Baggins!

"ALL MY BOYFRIENDS ARE WEREWOLVES!" claims local teen.

MOUNTAINS EXIST! Also, local scientist is cute, says smitten boyfriend.

"I SEE GHOSTS!" CLAIMS SOCIALITE.