Monday DE: JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!

[splash_of_blue]

Mrlgh.

Today's DE, which has absolutely not in any way been shamelessly nicked from Debi in crackchat...

All the characters you play get into a death match. How does that play out?

Comments

[acertainpov]

As I mentioned in crackchat - it mostly just becomes an epic sword fight between Gamora and Obi-Wan Kenobi while the others watch.

Dick: "shouldn't... we help?"
Fives: "Nah kid, trust me you don't want to get in the middle there."
Simba: "Do we have to fight each other?"
Dinah: "Tell you what, we'll let those two fight it out and then we can gang up on the winner when he or she is tired."
Will: *taking notes on sword technique*

[mogget_cat]

Unfortunately, it's probably over before it starts.

[configuration_birdwatcher]

Supposing that there's something compelling each of them to make an earnest attempt at fighting everyone else with no alliances, Aradia and Bastion quickly devastate the competition. I think Aradia has the upper hand no matter what, but to what degree depends on how fast she runs out of time power juice. Tracer is a good counter for Bastion in game and Aradia can probably do a lot of the same stuff plus powerful telekinesis; however, she is not particularly bullet-resistant and can't pay attention to everything at once. If one of those two gets taken out before it's down to just them by multiple people attacking them at once or a lucky shot, the other definitely wins.

Everyone except Cirava has the ability to come back from death or survive intense destruction, so one possibility is that you're eliminated from the death match upon your first death (or incapacitation-that-would-be-death-for-most-people), like a much more brutal version of fighting to first blood, in which case Wilson and Thurlow retire to the stands to throw popcorn at the remaining fighters after getting taken out and Wormwood just kind of leaves. The other option is that you keep going until you exhaust your resurrective abilities, which tips the scale further in Aradia's favour since everybody else's is slower, more costly, and/or can be defeated by sufficiently chunky-salsa causes of death.

[configuration_birdwatcher]

As for All-Skate characters, Wendy fullofemptiness and the Purple Impostor impostor_syndrome don't significantly tip the scales but Yochelm causeofthethingwiththehat emerges as a third contender thanks to his immense void power and considerable resistance to being killed both permanently and just in general. While he doesn't have the sheer destructive power wielded by some of his kind, he's great at throwing things into the void, can turn into a kaiju if he feels like it's warranted, and if he makes an effort he has the option of deciding that unwanted physical effects simply don't apply to him due to being already nonexistent and/or dead on a metaphysical level. Glitch characters are pretty high-powered.

[from_the_outside]

Hand-to-hand: Sharon would beat Zinda who would beat Emma Swan who would beat Jack Twist. Danny Williams wouldn't hit any of the ladies.

Swords: Geralt would beat Caspian. Gideon the Ninth would beat Utena in anything other than a formal duel.

Shooting: Wolfwood wins, due to the sheer amount of firepower in the Cross Punisher.

Anne Shirley would stay the hell out of the whole thing.

Tia Dalma would beat everyone by summoning a damn hurricane/flood tide/tsunami/whirlpool/etc. Unless Ciri unleashes her Elder Blood and just flattens the surrounding area.

[scarletrevenger]

Yeah. Wanda’s got this.

[bjornwilde]

Ahsoka dominates the field as far as sword fighting though Jessica Drew and ALustin give her a run for her credits. Still, Ahsoka has the Force going for her.

Alustin does surprisingly well but this is more because people underestimate what paper magic can do, but ultimately is overwhelmed.

Jessica likely would win if she used her pheromones.

Although, Viv would be immune to them. And she could phase through attacks, use illusions to confuse, and just float above the field of battle and fire lasers down below.

But then you have Sabine with a jetpack to harry Viv and I'm sure she'd have some sort of electrical shorting bomb at her disposal.

Tybalt would be a tough opponent since he'd jump from shadow to shadow and slice and dice.

Ben would have to go tentacle Cuisinart to survive but I don't know how effective that would be given the field of battle. Sorry, Ben.

Wen Qing and Ben likely just hide in a corner and try and avoid the whole mess. She's competent but her best skills do not lay in battle.

[ceitfianna]

Charles and Demeter are the two most powerful, Charles would try and calm everyone, get shouted at and go sulk in a corner. Demeter probably wouldn't interfere, I feel like fighting to see who's the best was a thing that happened a lot with her family. If she's really annoyed, plants might come into play.

Tumnus would be hiding in a corner as would Moist, though Moist might be taking bets on results. Quentin and Sameth would have a good duel with swords, but I think at this point in canon, Sameth would win, but with no killing.

Hand to hand would be a mess between Will S., Cassian, William and Ivan. William would be out first as he's the youngest but if it got into shooting then Will S. would be out. I think Cassian and Ivan would be fairly matched but Ivan's bigger physically, as would Cassian and Will S.

[vexingmesmer]

Vex makes the first move -- he can puppet people, and he figures the big armed bloke is the one who needs to go, because he doesn't know how to counter the sword wizard and figures Zuko is small potatoes and will be the second to die at his hand. Zenigata is ued against himself, Vex has him snap his own neck, and that's one down.

Vex follows shortly after because Lan Zhan is on him and the man is skewered in a second. That was his beloved's father, and Vex is an evil spirit, obviously, and since appeasement and containment aren't an option, he just moves to elimination.

Zuko has watched this all happen within the span of seconds. Lan Zhan has no desire to fight him, though, but Lan Zhan now has to break the news about Zenigata to Wei Ying and grieve the man himself, and... yeah. Neither are happy.

[canttrickmeanymore]

this question isn't even fair. Peter and Harry wouldn't fight each other if you paid them. No matter what, they'd end up on the same side. if forced to face off - they'd just have an epic staring contest or something.

Now, if you bring infriga_forzare in - the fight would last a while, but i think it's a coin flip on which wily bastard gets the lucky shot in. even then, if Peter wins, it's by accident and he'll feel shitty about it b/c he doesn't wanna kill people.

[bjornwilde]

You know, I had a similar first take on this that my pups would just fake it until they found out what villain was making them fight each other and then kick true ass. I think I got lost in the details of how they would fake it though.

[configuration_birdwatcher]

Most of mine normally wouldn't fight each other, and the ones who would with sufficient provocation or bribery wouldn't fight all of the others - there's the possibility of everyone else having to fight Bastion if their combat programming activates in a particularly hard-to-dissuade manner, but the rest of them wouldn't fight each other - but I wanted to answer the question straight so I went with a mind-control-y handwave.

In that scenario there's a decent chance that Wilson knocks Bastion out harmlessly with a Pan Flute, along with anyone else standing too close, and they're fine after they come out of sleep mode. (I forgot about the panflute when I made my first post; that might tip the scales in the to-the-first-death version if he can get in range to use it on the heavy hitters, but he still can't win a game of resurrection poker against Aradia or Yochelm in the last-person-standing version.) Crisis now averted, they band together to break out of the arena.

[canttrickmeanymore]

i got kinda stuck b/c Harry is a Spider-Man fan... so assuming he didn't fanboy squeal first (which Peter would just turn pink over), he wouldn't be able to bring himself to fight the 'friendly neighborhood Spider-Man'.

looking at my giant muse list - it's a toss-up between Ba'al, Wolverine, and Connor MacLeod on who would win a death match - even then, only b/c Ba'al would cheat.

[bjornwilde]

Now I wonder about a DE topic where we ask what your pups think of each other.

Regardless, I do know Jess would pick up on Ahsoka bing a jedi damn quick and then wouldn't be able to harm her because Carol is such a Star Wars fan.

[canttrickmeanymore]

could be interesting. Peter mostly just likes everyone until there's a reason for him not to. =)

[inlovewithwords]

Unless they are somewhere R2 can just vent everyone into space or otherwise insta-kills before anyone can react and then roll off whistling merrily, Tavi wins.

[inlovewithwords]

If you include my past characters, Eriond would just quietly sit drinking hot chocolate until someone looked like they were in serious danger and calmly end the fight, or at least block that person off and keep letting everyone else wear themselves out.

[heartofthedream]

↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑

No one else in my deck even comes closer.

Important Caveats (in all of my rosters)

[heartofthedream]

- Sara Lance and Ten keep refusing to stay dead,
- Jean & Allison Hargreeves’s showdown would be spec-tac-ular,
- Chuck mopes because he’s the God of basically only on his one planet, while
- Persephone pats his hand in a very ‘there-there, dear’ fashion she's gotten good at with her own husband, and
- Star doesn’t die at all, because she’s not “alive” in mortal terms. That’s not what she exists.