Thursday DE: Honey, you won't believe this

[bjornwilde]

I've got another writing prompt:

Write your character's canon as a Florida Man headline.

For example, Iron Man might be "Florida Man builds mechanical suit and goes to war on terrorism."

Comments

[acertainpov]

Florida Man steals droids, kidnaps local teenager, flies stolen ship straight into the Galaxy's biggest naval base.

----

Florida Man goes on rampage at hospital, tries to assassinate the Chancellor.

----

Florida teenager makes a terrible bird costume and beats up the mentally ill.

---

Florida woman makes an even worse bird costume and beats up everyone.

---

Florida woman runs away with her boyfriend. Father destroys half the universe as a result.

---

Florida man says he isn't King of an African nature reserve. Locals disagree.

---
Florida Man has done nothing wrong, ever, in his entire life (except stand by and watch a bunch of war crimes happen and disown his brother for trying to stop them).

[angry_friendship_wolf]

Florida Man is actually the Terrible Wolf God Who Brings Only Death stuffed into an unconvincing human suit. Has bitten many people.

[alongfallfromgrace]

Florida man fakes mental health crisis during occult terrorism attack, steals donkey and peanuts.

Florida man starts, and then runs away from, a cult.

Florida man uses on-air time to actively encourage workers to bring large spiders into the workplace.

Florida man attacks cursed table with axe

[takethatnature]

Florida man, kicked out of graduate school, accidentally sends himself to another dimension.

Florida omnic in mental health crisis talked down from committing murder-suicide by a bird.

Florida teen livestreams own SWATting attack and self-mutilation.

Florida girl communes with ghosts, tricks ex-boyfriend into fulfilling apocalyptic prophecy, angers cosmic horrorterror.

Florida man tampers with ancient ruins, claims to be from the moon, commands army of giant carnivorous plants.

Florida enby investigates government conspiracy, learns occult secrets, is haunted by ghost of murder victim.