ways_back_room | And with a Crash-

Fading out is an echo of two voices...

"He's an angsty, emo, heartless sorcerer swordsman."

"He totally needs to get laid, then."

There's never a good closet around when you need one- at least, ever since someone came up with Rule #3. So what if Laini and Zelgadiss missed the stairs and whatever else door they were aiming for- They're at least out of the bar right now, and Laini is doing her best to get him out of his clothes.

(As for hers- Shapeshifter. That will only take a moment, unless he wants to help as well!)

They crash the door into the back room and onto a convenient couch. Zel winces a bit as the back of his head hits the armrest (because Laini is totally doing the pouncing) and, noticing their surroundings, says eloquently, "Um. Where are we?"

Laini blinks, maybe finally distracted. Somewhat. "Good question- though someone did leave a drink here."

Zelgadiss eyes said drink. It's blue. Very blue. "Yeah, but what sort is it?"

BACKROOM INVASION! Tag freely! Threadhop! Make crack! It's not canon and it doesn't really happen! Allons-y!

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The girl pulls back and begins to jump up and down excitedly, clasping her hands together. "I hugged Timothy Dalton! I mean James Bond! I HUGGED TIMOTHY DALTON'S JAMES BOND! I have fulfilled a lifelong dream."

Beat.

"Coffee?"

Bond sighs and purses his lips. "I'll need something a lot stronger than coffee."

"Oooh, you're sexy when you're mad. And scary. I just watched The Hulk. Don't turn all green and smashy on me ok? :D?"

"Do I look like Eric Bana to you?"

"No. You're hotter."

Beat.

"--coffee? I make pretty decent French press. Got some tasty tasty organic coffee from My Organic Market, which is like the best coffee ever, it tastes all nutty and sweet and chocolaty and as if you are drinking the very essence of the earth from whence the coffee came.

"Of course you can always spike it, too."

Debi clears her throat and waves her glass in their direction. There's a clang of ice.

"Bottle of Maker's Mark in the kitchen," she offers.

"Oh, sweet," Midge replies. "Bond would totally tap that."

"Begging your pardon, ma'am, but I can state for myself what I like and what I don't like."

Pause. He looks at Debi. "I would love the Maker's Mark. You said it was in the kitchen? I'll go fetch it, then."

Even though he thinks the women should totally fetch it for him.

"Cheers," Debi says cheerfully, and thrusts her glass at him boldly.

"Top me up too?"

:-)?

Bond stares at her.

As he is not Roger Moore or Sean Connery, he will not dignify that with a verbal response. But, now there iz booze in her cup too!

Debi grins smugly.

"Ta, mate" she says, apparently trying (and failing badly) to sound vaguely cockney. "How's it going?"

Bond blinks. "--well." Pause. "And yourself?"

He vaguely recalls sharing headspace with someone who sounds cockney whenever he yells at people. Especially redheaded children who bite his hand.

Redheaded children should have their teeth clipped, clearly.

"Not bad." She grins. "I'm on holiday. In America."

Bond makes a sympathetic expression. "How's that working out for you?"

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Sarah Jane is watching, baby in her arms. She is mildly confused.

"You do realise that if it were possible, he really would. 'Bond smash' has a ring to it, don't you agree?"

"Totally. It's got the one syllable words thing going for it."

"Not to mention the temper."

"And your husband totally doesn't need to transform into a rageful green monster! I mean, all you gotta do is paint him green and he's good to go."

Sarah giggles and glances down at her baby.

"I'm sure Valerie would have a blast seeing her father in green."

"Exactly!" She glances down at the baby. "See, Valerie? How silly your father is?"

"James isn't silly, he's just..."

Midge pauses, thinks, thinks back to many, many instances in book canon where...

"...no, you're right. He's silly."

"I'd like to think that I know him well enough by now," Sarah says, a tad smug. "He's very silly."

"He has a short attention span. Also he apparently becomes an idealistic hippie on a natural diet."

Edited 2008-01-22 04:45 (UTC)

Sarah Jane shakes his head. "Oh no he won't. Not if I have anything to say about it. A hamburger is perfectly acceptable at times."

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