ways_back_room | DE: Time after time

I just had another idea, based on random fandomness in the tram today. Where's the post for suggestions again, please?

As for my charries: Teja's axe gives you inexhaustible stamina in a fight, but has the severe disadvantage that you can't stop while there are still enemies of any kind facing you. Hannibal Lecter's mask makes you utterly ruthless, and gives you a very supreme way with words and deep insights. You can only be stopped if somebody plays something by Bach as recorded by Glenn Gould in your earshot; then, you must stop to listen and enjoy the music, and the mask can be neutralised. Lorenzo de'Medici's lute makes you extremely sensitive to all the cultural trends of the moment; you become a bellwether for fashion, style, and popular culture. To take it from you, you must be attacked inside a church. A silver snake bracelet from Sirona gives you the ability to step sideways through slightly alternative versions of reality; to get it off you, you need to put the arm you wear it on into the water of a hot sulphuric spring. A scale from Tamara's tail makes you irresistible to sailors.

Right here. I've also set it as the first link in my nav bar if you go to my journal. = ]

Tramdomness!

Tramdom!! It is a thing now.

*eyes journal name*

.... *micdrop*

In all seriousness, Joshua made an Artifact (seen here on his desk) that basically gives everyone in a ten-foot radius a caffiene high. It's not bad, until you get caffiene poisoning.

However, Joshua would like to point out that there are four classifications of Artifacts, as seen here. Not everything has to actually have powers, there can be technological things too.

And he's eying you all and hoping he has enough static bags, goo, and gloves.

Also, can I gigglefit over the fact that a W13 DE appears on

minkhollow's birthday? I am amuse.

Also also, if you can't think up an Artifact, I might bounce around and hand some out. Or at least some ideas.

Edited 2013-10-02 12:26 (UTC)

Also, can I gigglefit over the fact that a W13 DE appears on [personal profile] minkhollow's birthday? I am amuse.

And that is what we call serendipity as I had no idea. = ]

Well, Serendipity is my stripper name..... /canon quoting

As for my others....

Helena has her own sector of the Warehouse, which includes, among other things, a grappling hook, a time machine, a vest that makes you go REALLY FAST, and a pair of magnetic boots. (which she still wears more than occasionally.) In my headcanon, she made an Artifact when Christina died, but I don't think that one's been found yet.

Fantine's locket that she sells in canon is probably an Artifact. It gives your child(ren) extremely good luck, but you end up not being able to keep food down.

Valentine probably has a notebook out there where things that you write in it come to life. The only way to get rid of the things is to write them out of the story.

minkhollow and I joke that our engagement turtle necklases are an Artifact that absorbs excess emotion, and helps balance the people who are wearing them. Downside is that if only one person's wearing one, they get all of the emotion.

Edited 2013-10-02 12:19 (UTC)

Fuckin' Artifacts, man, how do they work.

Cata and Sam are hard to come up with particular objects for. Knowing Cata, it'd probably be a favorite poison-pill ring. It attracts the opposite sex, but only such members as you'd rather ~~die~~ kill than sleep with.

Sam, meanwhile, probably has several. The sword he beheaded Mizzamir with, while not his, is practically an Artifact in canon, being a magical sword whose purpose is to kill. (It was the weapon to hand, okay?) Otherwise, his never-miss ability would rub off on several of his throwing knives and darts, and the cloak he used during the epic quest probably picked up some of the Shadowslipping stuff (this is an aspect of canon I haven't really played with, but basically you can move around within the world's shadows); the downside there is the longer you use it, the less you want to come back to the real world.

Claudia has created several Artifacts already, and improved on some others. Among the ones to her name: electrified handcuffs, hologram projector, laser mic, Tesla grenade.

Apollo likewise has several things in Warehouse canon that could be attributed to him, though whether he actually created them or the belief of his worshipers did the work is always a good question. What they do depends on which one you pick up, given the breadth of his domain, but they probably all give you an insufferable ego until they're taken from you.

I maintain Imp used an Artifact to unleash music with rocks in it on the world (and after the last round of Plot With Rocks In, it's in the Warehouse). His harp is also well on its way to becoming an Artifact, though I'm not quite sure what it does.

Regulus... I'm not sure. (Whatever it is, if we go by canon the downside is that you do something really stupid on behalf of a house elf.)

Red's cloak, obviously. Though once again I'm not sure what it does.

Red's cloak, obviously.

...This brain of mine. I see that phrasing, and two thoughts come immediately to mind, neither of which has anything to do with your character's canon.

BTW, I hope you have a great birthday day. = D

*thinks* *considers* *ponders* *thinks more*

I could use some help, I think, but I've got some preliminary ideas.

Felix might have the mythril bag(s) (probably no more than two, definitely no more than four), which could be less-effective, more-portable versions of the purple goop canisters. Other candidates include his cape (never actually mentioned, but it's a significant part of his appearance) and the Sol Blade (sword that can summon meteors), but I'm not certain how to Artifact them.

Fluttershy has no obvious candidates save her Element necklace, and possibly the Gala dress. Um... I'unno?

Kain's spear would probably make people extra-springy and also jealous and fratricidal. There's a reason the GBA version namedrops Abel in reference to it. Possibly his helmet would do something too, but I'm not sure what.

Fluttershy's necklace: You can talk to animals! But you're paralysed with fear at the thought of talking to anyone you actually need to convey information to.

Oh boy! Artifacts! Lemme show you my canon's version of them!

So there are twelve items called the Elder Artifacts that where left behind by the Elder Gods when they shaped the multiverse because the Elder Gods are lazy slob jerkfaces. Anyway, there's the Stone of Jas, which seems to be power itself and was the first artifact created. Then there's the Elder Kiln of Ful and the lava monsters that it pops out, which are the most advanced tech of all the artifacts and seem to have played a part in RAISING MOUNTAINS. The Staff of Armadyl and the Sword of Skagaroth so far only have been effective at killing or injuring gods and transferring divine power. Wait, no, the sword is also a suped up version of Will Perry's Subtle Knife; it cuts through to alternate dimensions and doesn't afraid of anything. The Elder Horn (no name yet) so far has given Quin the Seasinger enormous power over the creatures of the sea. It may be an amplification device. Finally, there is the Crown Archival, which can locate the other artifacts but in turn alerts the holders of those other artifacts of the crown's location.

My headcanon used to say that Amascut corrupted the Staff of Armadyl to give it its god killing powers when it was used against her but I am sure official canon will contradict me on this in several ways pretty soon. In canon she has recently acquired the Kharid-ib diamond which isn't an Elder Artifact but is very artifact-like. It possesses people and just wants to go back home and get away from Amascut.

But for a personal artifact I nominate the weird spear/sword on a stick that Amascut is portrayed with in statues of her. I suspect it is a Staff of Light. Prior to a combat mechanic update to the game, it was able to create a personal shield-bubble of solid light and was a very good polearm type melee weapon in addition to a very good magic staff. It is still able to randomly reduce the rune cost of spells. I suppose it could, as an artifact, make the wielder a very efficient and very frugal killer of things.

For Fairy Fixit, I nominate a holy wrench that is unnaturally proficient at percussive maintenance, even when it comes to software bugs and ghosts in the machine.

Evil Chicken... hmmm... I am gonna need help here. His nest gets raided occasionally in order to steal the egg he laid (gender confusion everywhere, I know) and I am betting that is traumatic enough to create an artifact. But beyond that *shrug*

Edited 2013-10-02 15:40 (UTC)

PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE.

Helena was pleased to see her time machine smacking made it into that thing. (Because it was pretty epic. It's around 1:43 or so.)

Aren't you glad I linked to the youtube video instead of the TVTropes page that inspired it? Luckily it came to my attention yesterday. :P

I didn't notice the W13 clip in there! I see Helena and Claudia, but who are the other two helping them with the time machine maintenance?

The guy with the curly hair that you only see his backside of is Artie. he's the paranoid boss of the Agents.

The white-haired lady is Rebecca, a former agent, and one of

minkhollow's favourite characters.

Oof, I wasn't sure if Artie was that tall.

Everyone else is kinda short, and the shot's at an odd angle, I think. Claud's pretty short, Helena's not that tall, and Rebecca's pretty short too.

*shrug* Everyone in the Warehouse is pretty short. Except Pete and Myka.

Four generations of Warehouse gent beating a machine into submission! Of course it had to be there. :D

Ben: A piece of his hide that got knocked off. It grants the wearer increased stamina and strength but makes you self conscious and irritable. To cancel the affects, you must eat a dozen genuine New York hotdogs, from street vendors of course.

Val: One of her gauntlets. It moves the wearer through time or space in random ways, most likely causing the wearer to get lost. It can be taken off at anytime but you are stuck where you take it off.

Jess: A perfume bottle whose scent either causes sexual attraction or fear, depending on what the wearer wished at the time the perfume was sprayed. I can't think of much else, such as the downside or how to be released.

Anton: A minidisc player that plays songs which prove to be eerily predictive. Only way out of the prediction is to outsmart the situation.

Thalia: A bracelet that clouds the minds of those who oppose you, sometimes even causing fear or panic in them. Downside is an uncontrollable ambition and thirst for power.

And I'm drawing a blank for Andrea, Quinlan, and Hank.

Edited 2013-10-02 15:41 (UTC)

Gordon's original crowbar, the one taken from him by the G-Man at the end of game 1. The wielder is able to use it as a profoundly potent bludgeoning weapon regardless of whether or not they have any training in such weapons, but experience little to no interest in talking or in giving the crowbar up. They can, they just don't want to. Putting it down and walking away lets them get back up to normal volubility levels in a few hours.

The HEV suit would count as a purely technological artifact with an uncanny ability to sift through possibility lines at any given extremely deadly situation; the wearer will get through the situation alive, but due to the suit basically pulling a sum-over-histories quantum phenomenon on the macro level, the wearer briefly lives through every single possible way they could die or otherwise screw up in the situation before landing on the one probability line where they make it out. This reflects the number of times I had to save and reload during the Half-Life games because I kept getting poor Gordon killed at the same points.

Tommy's Artifact would be his firefighter helmet. It's his most personal piece of equipment and he's had the same one throughout his career, so it's deeply connected to him. Wearing it gives the user the urge to run toward danger, which could be taken as either bravery or stupidity or insanity, depending on the situation. And since Mia had once cast a fireproofing spell on it, the residual magic allows the wearer to withstand fire and extreme heat without other protective gear. Drawbacks are a foul mouth, a short temper, and a taste for whiskey.

Yrael's violin, when activated by use by a musician, will captivate any audience who hears it. Some will be moved to tears, other moved to rapture, none will be spared. The downside is that as the violin gets used, the wielder's body and mind will gradually be corrupted and corroded into an unrecognizable monster. ^_^ Possibly with magic powers.

Sunshine's baking tray gets 12d6 against Undead. >_>

Derp. I can't thread properly worth anything today. *hugs*

Edited 2013-10-02 17:52 (UTC)

<333!

Jim: A whiskey bottle. Whenever you're holding it you get an incredible urge to empty it as quickly as possible. Also maybe some guns that make you shoot fast or something.

Borgel: Any of his absurdly large number of suitcases. They grant extraordinary long life, but also a tendency to barge in unannounced, leave without telling anybody, and travel without having any idea of where you're going.

Leela: Dagger and janis thorns. Endows the user with bravery and an indomitable spirit. Perhaps a bit too indomitable at times.

Kane: The Tacitus. Its powers are vague and mysterious but it's the key to mastery of Tiberium.

Caius: Um, not sure, really. Near the end of the main quest he gives you his shirt and pants which make you better at sneaking, I guess? Sure, we'll go with pants.

Garyn: Gods, where to start? He's got more of those than you can shake a stick at. Just going by swords alone you've got Trueflame (original blade of Nerevar, enchanted with fire, looks fucking stupid), Goldbrand (dragonmade katana, burns your enemies and increases your stamina and strength), Chrysamere (aka the Paladin's Blade, a claymore that can heal your wounds), and Umbra (can bind the souls of enemies who it kills to a soul gem, but also consumes the user's will and personality). The most powerful artifacts associated with him lorewise are Kagrenac's Tools, which were created by the Dwemer enchanter Kagrenac in order to tap into the deep mythopoeic forces of the universe (e.g. Rebel, King, and Observer) in order to ascend his race to godhood. In game, they're a pretty bitchin' gauntlet (Wraithguard), warhammer (Sunder), and shortsword (Keening). But the one most closely associated with Garyn would be the Moon and Star, a ring that served as the personal emblem of Nerevar Indoril. It grants the wearer enhanced powers of persuasion, but it kills anyone who tries to wear it besides Lord Nerevar. Supposedly. Conveniently the game never lets anybody else try it on (well, except through the console, I think).

Also, I'd like to imagine that the prison boat that carried him and Jiub (who eventually earns a well-deserved sainthood for wiping the cliff racers from Morrowind) ends up having pieces of wood from its hull sold as relics on a regular basis. Much like the One True Cross, there are probably enough pieces of it to build an entire navy. I'd imagine a genuine piece would make its bearer destined for greatness followed by a sudden disappearance.

Edited 2013-10-02 17:56 (UTC)

Oh, goodness. In Autor's canon, he actually owns a few things "required" for proper channeling of creative works:

Paper made from ten-year-old reeds
Ink in a seven-to-three ratio of blue to black
A quill made from the feather of a white swan who has crossed the sea three times
And tea - three parts Darjeeling to one part Assam, which is more ritual than anything

As in canon, they all do nothing. He'd label them Artifacts to rub elbows with everyone else, convinced that they work.

Ha! Oh man, this is perfect. Oh Autor, kiddo.

Jack's helmet is totally an artifact. It grants nigh-invulnerability. Downsides? It only fails when it's dramatic for it to do so, but when it is a moment of high tension, it will fail, guaranteed.

Max has made a few technological ones. They're called Warblers, and they're freaking awesome.

Erik's coat never gets lost, or damaged, and the wearer can come up with moments of genius (that may well make other artifacts), but you become highly vulnerable to suggestion.

Alfred's suit never needs ironing, and is better than body armour, but you have to speak in an upper class English accent all the time, or it looses it's effect.

Trowa doesn't really have iconic possessions. Other than a giant robot, I guess, but a) that's really pretty noticeable, and b) it got fired into the sun a few years back anyway, and c) there are already two canonical giant robots that mess with their pilot's head in exchange for a power boost, so I don't really think we need to add more.

...Actually, you know what, I lie. His clown mask, and it makes lions (and possibly other animals?) like and trust you, at least up to a point. Not sure about drawbacks, other than wearing a ridiculous-looking clown mask on half your face.

Thor's hammer is basically already an Artifact, from the sound of it, albeit a really powerful and choosy one. People who know Warehouse 13, am I wrong about that? I suspect the drawback is that it's really easy to break things if you're not used to having The Power Of Thor. (And does it need to have a special thing to be gotten rid of if it only lets a tiny number of people use it anyway?)

For River, I will pick a Millicanon possession instead of a canonical one, and that's the brown duster that Roland gave her. It gives you uncannily perfect aim, but also unpredictable hallucinations. To lose both, you just have to deliberately take it off -- not just stop wearing it, but mentally put it down and step away from the metaphorical gun.

Regan's is probably her wedding ring, I guess, but I have no idea what it does.

Clare I am likewise uncertain of. She doesn't really have possessions other than her sword, anyway, and her powers are mostly within the norm for her kind, so... I'm not sure!

Thor's hammer is literally an Artifact. It's shown in the Warehouse.

You don't have to have a special way to get rid of it. You can just goo it or, well... no one can use it unless it likes them, so it just sits on a shelf.

Ha! Well then.

Hm, I think Will's artifact would be the knife that Robin gave him, which doesn't require sharpening. I'm not sure of the downside.

Charles' artifact could be a couple of options depending on when in his life its from. The chess set he plays with Erik could give you a view into another side's tactics but the downside is you also feel all their emotions. Another could be his chair or something connected with Cerebro, all of them would basically have a touch of his telepathy.

I feel like for Moist the artifact would be something that allows you to forge any signature or a suit that no notices you in. Not invisible but not noticed, but if you're seen, no one forgets your face. His gold Postmaster's hat is definitely an artifact of some sort, the Disc is crawling with them.

I've no idea for William or Sameth. Sameth basically makes artifacts with the Charter, so its harder to think of one that would be purely his versus one of the many things he's made like Lirael's hand.

Jane's would be one of her pen's, a shawl, so many options. Actually a book recently came out based around artifacts of her life and used it to look at her. I need to read that but would love more suggestions.

Demeter is tricky due to her being a goddess since I know there must be hundreds of them through the centuries. Quinn created one of a shawl she used that brings on a great mourning and brings Winter with it. I loved that idea.

Tumnus' would be Lucy's handkerchief which gives bravery or a renewed sense of hope, no clue of the downside.

The Pirate King's bandannas grant great kissing prowess but don't prevent against kissing the wrong person. And any person wearing one will find their shirt buttons breaking.

For the record, even though it hasn't been mentioned, I'm pretty sure Jane has at least one actual Artifact in the Warehouse. Not sure what they do either, but I'm certain they exist.

That makes complete sense but yes, the details are tricky with her as there are a lot of options.

DE: Time after time

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